alone in the darkness...

2004-12-22T09:47:00.000+08:00

no more sorriess. no more love story.

feelings come and go..

on 26th of August,you turned back..
i chose to believe and trust you again,
but again..
20th of Dec,you left me again.
this time,it's for another girl.

your sorries doesn't help to heal the wound in my heart
but it makes it hurt more.

i won't blame you. really,cause i know love is something that cannot be forced.
but i will keep..
the picture we've taken together,
the letters you've given me,
the teddy bear,
and also all the memories we've once sharedd..

btw,i wouldn't be blogging anymore.
the blog will be closed down,
i won't blog anymore.
but the website will be still on..
for all my memories..

i don't need you to turn back,
i don't need you to feel bad/guilty,
i don't need your sympathy..

from this moment onwards,
i won't shed a single tear for him anymore
i won't love him anymore.

last of all,byeexx.

2004-12-11T10:37:00.000+08:00

finally i can blog,waited for one hour plus.

i'm back (:
i've decided to change. so pardon me for what i've done for the past.`

so many times happened for the last two weeks. band practices on every thursday and friday,i'm going crazyy over mengshan. getting really stressed about her nowadays,so many problems surfaced. how am i going to cope with her when school reopen? now,i have to teach her everything again. how i wished i can give her up~ and my burden will be lessen,then i can concentrate on my playing. i really want to do well for singapore rhapsody and westridge overture,especially on my high notes and my solo. wonder whether sir will let me play solo alone,maybe i can't cope with it because i'll be having stage fright.

school's reopening soon,my homeworks aren't completed yet. still left with amaths,english and chinese. =\ got a shock of my life when yongkiat told me that my amaths teacher is changed to ms lee,the softball teacher. -sighs- i hate that new education system where we get our results in december and school starts in march. it's gonna be very rush,and we would not be able to relax ourself as much as the current sec 4s. and also that five- day week,school ends at 3 everyday and starts at normal time.` wtf. and how much time will we be left with for the rest of the day? still have to cope with studies,friends and also cca.

i've been meeting junxing very little now. -sighs- i miss him alot alot ):

deex daddy,been losing contact with her already. [[ daddy,i msg you never reply me ]]
yun mommy,alot of things happened to ya recently right? when you see this,msg me at my new number kaes. get it from daddy or hsin kaes? (:
justin di,happy belated birthday!. your prezzie will arrive soon.
budd, really fortunate having such a buddy beside me.
youjun,thanks for cheering me up.
wuya,you ps me!.
jess,stay strong. there's still alot of nice guys on the street,there's sure someone who will fit your bill.
bel,you're engaged now.

geex,i'm addicted to calling pple's chinese name now.

countdown : 3 weeks (:

btw,i won't be blogging often now. or maybe i'll close down this blog,i want to keep everything to myself. don't worry budd,i'm not getting zi bi`- hehes. takkaire. i told you i wanna change, (:

byex. junxing, iLu. muackxx.-

2004-11-27T10:42:00.000+08:00

blogger is ok now (:
hasn't been able to update for the past few days and also rather lazy to blog for the past week.

let me think abt things that are worth remembering for the past week,
- 16th : class chalet
- 17th : still at chalet
- 19th : nco camp pop
- 21st : dunno what clean day at mountbatten
- 25th : music exchange with bukit view
- 26th : my third month with deariee.

I'm gonna be straight with my words now,the teachers may be visiting our blogs every now and then. But perhaps it may be a good thing,cause we need not tell them face to face to let them know how we feel abt school life. After all,a blog is used for writing what you feel. It doesn't matter who reads it and has any comments`-

16th - tuesday, 17th - wednesday
Ermm,the class chalet was fun. lolss. met up with ting at central to buy our chalet things,then waited for the rest of them to arrive at mac. sat there for quite sometime,and then they slowly arrive. we left mac at ard 1plus. we all took cabs down to downtown east pasir ris,qirui's sister bf helped us to sign in` we unpacked our things and nick they all started playing cards. me+nianshun had afternoon nap there,then we had sianrui's beehoon and fried rice for dinnerr. watched the champions final episode there,while ting+jb+nick+ck were playing mahjong outside the chalet. during midnight,we went to the park nearby,it's so damn scary and spooky. I was totally freaked out,when sianrui they all wanted to go to the redhouse there. I don't wanna go,so i went to fetch qirui they all,then later accompanied them to redhouse there,and i was stucked outside the redhouse,ting and jb accompanied me. lolss. i nv want to step inside there!. btw,i also lost my simcard there ): sadden,lost among the grasses there and there isn't any way to find it cause it's pitched dark. went back to chalet ard 4plus and we slept there. jb woke me up at 7plus,when he was bullying ting.` then me and ting went to bathe,ting has rashed all over her body. we took her to white sands to see a doctor and the doctor gave her a jab on her butt -.- lolss. called my mom too,to cancel my line and also to report loss. had bbq at night,saw richie papa there and he treat us drinkss. desmond's father sent me home after that, i was bombarded with lotsa questions!. =\ was totally exhausted when i got homee.

19th - friday
had band that day. sectional practicess,mine was the last slot and i had to wait till 3pm. after that,me+hsin have to lock the music room and tidy things for ms chan and we rushed home. dearie sent me home,hehes. (: then i changed my clothes and i took the wrong bus so i was late!. lolss. sir sent us there,and i had to put the box on my lap which is damn heavy. pop was all right,and i saw my favourite band,tanjong katong display band. yeahhss. sat with ms lee they all,watched the whole parade. after that,me and jess went to disturb bel and i saw dionna standing behind bel. woahss. waited agn for bel to change her clothes and we went down to toa payoh to celebrate adzrul's birthday`we treated him pizza hut (: hehes. after that,we took a bus home. lolsss.

21st - sunday
daddie pulled me down to mountbatten there to attend what clean green day de. saw mr gok there,and was pushed by alot of pple cause i was standing near mr gok. -.- idiott. then budd was supposed to come down to help his friends but in the end,he ps him cause he had a job interview.`- i made him call me and chat,cause daddie ps me and walked ard with his friends. so i was alonee there,so damn boredd ): lolss. then daddie took me home ard 10plus and we got lunch at serangoon gardens. the rest of day,was all righttt. i was busy with my sims2 =x

25th - thursday
we had music exchange with bukit view that day,dearie accompanied me to school. i reached there quite early to prepare all our stuffss. took a bus ride there,which is damn long. reached there,we combined practice with them. it's seems like normal practice -.- then we had sectionals with the tutor there,that tutor was horrible. eeekkks. she taught us nothing special,she just taught us hw to play this part and so on. totally different from sir,at least sir would analysize the score with us and made us understand why this part has to be played this way and so on..` and i actually didn't learn anything there,the flute players were ok. i didn't learn anything from them and they didn't learn anything from me. lolss. i was like guiding them throughout the singapore rhapsody cause' they weren't familar with the song. so basically,it wasn't quite a fun experience. =\ went to mac with huimei and jess,and i was told that ms chan they all were deciding whether to hire ms leong as our tutor,blehsss. i'm strongly against it!!!.- =\

26th - friday
had the most exhausting practice i've ever had!. sir "tortured" me,but somehow choonwei was there to help me with some parts of the song. sir kept pushing me to take in more air and play louder. and my stomach was awfully pain with all those crampss.`- then i was like half died. ): slept for a while during practice. lolss. me and jolene had to learn to be independent,so both of us had to depend on one anotherrr. btw,we played singapore rhapsody and westridge overture for the entire day. the pressure i'm having now is increasing,how i wished choonwei could come back and help me. at least i won't fee so lonely and pressurised. haishx. after band,went home with bel they all. and saw choonwei at interchange,lolss. he left earlier than us. chatted with him for quite sometime and we left.

this day was also me and dearr de third month. i msged him at 12 then i went to sleep,then he called at 12.42 lidat. i picked up the phone and i forgot what i told him. i only rmbed the part when he asked me to go slp,lolss. then i said ok and i put down. i woke up ard 6plus when jess gave me morning call.` i checked my call records and i saw his number,i tout it was a dream at firsttt. blehsss.` lolss. i asked jun to help me ask him to call me at night,and i asked him..then he said i didn't say anything. lolss. chatted with him for a while and put down lerrss.

ermx,i have to tidy my room later and also do some studying. hmmss,left with only one month of holiday. and after that,i gonna go thru hell next yr. 2oo5.- no matter how tough it is,i hope i can pull it thru and believe that i will pass in no time (:

lolss. i'm addicted to sims2 lers!. (:

2004-11-15T01:51:00.000+08:00

i hate my msn. it keeps me so much problems!

geex. my sims 2 cd is arriving in abt 13 hrs time (:

let me think how did i spent my past two days`
saturday was all ryte,i guess so. went over to jasss hse to discuss abt 2f'o3 class chalet thingy. still haven asked for permission to stay overnight there =\ hmms. i miss all my classmates,i had such a chaotic + hectic 2oo4. how i wished i cld turn back time..~ back to the afternoon,nick + edwin bought tou hua and tou nai for teabreak (: hehes,nick's scar is so damn scary. left ard 6plus,when kor called ting's hp. lolss. kor called jess + steph to ask where i am. then jess and bel got worried` actually there wasn't any reception at jasss hse so daddie and kor couldn't reach me =\ had dinner with my family and so on..
sunday,woke up at ard 10plus. had my breakfast and do my maths,but then stopped a while later and then i slacked (: till afternoon,a man came to fix our scv box and he changed the box and remotess. lolss. my hamsters are so pathetic,haish. they fought till so badly and one of them was badly injured. my heart ached when i saw the wounds and dried blood on its head. haishx. watched ghost for sales with kor,then later daddie came back ): so we stopped halfway. had bbq chicken wings for dinner,so damn blardy full. daddie stuff me and kor with so much food. after dinner,we watched this show on channel 8. hehes,so damn funny. kor and jie said daddie brought us to the cinema and watched but i don't rmb a single thing not even the story line!.

was chatting with jun online till my msn keep signing in and out on it's own!.
fuck. idiot msn,now i can't chat with all my other friendss.!
all because of my brother's dloading movies,make the whole com and internet connection so laggy. -.-
damn kiasu lehs him!..

arghss. i miss my dearie. i really miss him alot alot alot!..

btw,i felt like sending a mail to her abt irwin's thingy. she thinks i'm e anonymous in her blog -.- i wun do it,even i want to scold her is also using my own name not anonymous.` i have the right to scold her ryte..? for sending such a msg. haishss. things are over isn't it?. hope dearie keeps his promise.

2 weeks of holidays passed just like that,left with 6 weeks =\ i'm still left with lotsa undone work. geezzz.

sims2,i'm crazzy over it. blehss. band is also having music exchange on the 25/26. i'm gonna hate sir and bel for it. my third month anniversary is taken away by them!. ): thinking i can spend it with him,but i can't now.. -sighs-

daddie's out to nag at me and kor agn. byeeexxxx.

2004-11-13T01:12:00.000+08:00

early morning (:

hsin now "flying" to shanghai. and she's gonna miss alot of things!. she's missing the champions' final episode,2f'o3 class chalet and lotsa fun.

Let me think..
I went for band today. yepps,walked to mac from my hse.,met choonwei there and we walked to school together. Reached there quite early,so me+choonwei played flute in the band store. tracy was there too,playing with choonwei's and mine tamagotchi =/ then later,we went back to music room to do our hwk. stupid amaths is confusing me alot alot. then later sir brought me+huimei our for lunch. Returned to music room,helped bel with the camp thingy. We started playing the set piece today,lolss. quite fun (: i wonder how mengshan is gonna make it..` i'm not gonna to spend another effort on her. i'm sick and tired of it. sir released the other sections early cause' he wanted to concentrate on e clarinet,but e few of us stayed to wait for bel. stayed till ard 6,we had alot of jokes. lolss.

tml's saturday. how am i gonna spend it? slack!!! (: lolss.

i miss my dearie,i can't msg him anymore. ): he stayed at jeeboon hse for e whole day. how can jeeboon betray cristabel!. =x lols.
daphne is out too. goshhh. blehss. =/ budd is getting sims2 cd on monday!!!. (: yeahss. i'm getting too excited abt it.

mandl and jess want to ton,i'm not tonning cause' i'm way too tired.

lolss. i watched both shark tale and princess diaries 2. yepps. both shows rock!. but i prefer princess diaries,they played the song canon in d (: and we saw mk in there too -.- lolss. shark tale,oscar is so lamee. and that lola,so materialistic!. >.<

i'm off to bed now. takkaire peeps.`

2004-11-11T02:14:00.000+08:00

pan yun ("v") jun xing

Just edited blog,lotsa things missing. Peeps of my life, are they really my true friends? After all,i still left with nothin'.

Kor wanted me to pass this msg ard,or rather to those who know him.
There's this guy/girl has been posing as him in friendster,he/she stole his photos and placed it online. -.- His friendster name is Jordon,has lotsa of information abt kor. psycho` Btw if he adds you, better don't add him back.

kor's official friendster account is Jordon_legolas@hotmail.com. Add him if you want to.

I sort of had this big quarrel with hsin today,and my mood totally went down for the entire afternoon.

Dearie sent me home,he managed to cheer me up. But that matter can't get out of my mind,till then,i realised alot of things. alot alot of things. Perhaps it's a blessing in disguise? No more friends,No more sisters but only budd + dear+pigg ` Nobody understands me except for them..really none..How dissappointing it is? I'm such a failure.

Shall turn in anytime. Got to compose songs tml,and also another tuition..`

what's is e most impt element in a friendship/relationship?
basic trust.

2004-11-06T19:43:00.000+08:00

i'm still sick. =/ but only sore throat + flu .

mommie took care of me for e whole day (: sweet?
budd threatened to treat me drink ginger tea if i don't get well!. lolss. i hate that drink,it sounds so digusting. where got pple drink ginger de. eeekkk.

friday-
had band practice and of course extra lessons. went to school together with kor + rickson,daddie dropped us at the school gate cause' kor need to get his pass. i sat at the foyer there,and then jess arrived. she let me eat her pocky,she bought alot of snacks to eat in class -.- lolss. went for 1 hr of band,sir asked me to arrange e competition set piece,it's so damn messy..made me so confused -.- went for my amaths class at 9,lessons were all right. hsin pon band!. lolss. she forgot there's band =x then abt 10 lidat,i went back to music room to arrange my scores. left ard 10.4oam,continued my amaths lessons. so much gladdd that i'm able to understand e topic on circular measure and matrices (:
talked to sir abt mengshan thingy,i told him i wanna give up. he asked me not to,and he promised to look into mengshan's problem (: great isn't it. i won't have to worry about her anymore!. sir told bel to arrange a sectional for us. yepps. lolss. i'm gonna improve my flute playing,hope i have the time to improve on it cause' sir told us there will concerts for us. shld i be happy or sad?. having a concert means more practice + stress,cause' choonwei wasn't there to support me and i'm suppose to support yingqi + mengshan. =/

saturday-
today seems a breeze for me,everything passes so fast. I woke up at ard 9plus,went online for a while. went up to study for abt 2hrplus. (: good ryte?!. completed my chinese tys lers,except for e compos. in e afternoon,i went online ,i was editing e other blog but then my internet connection suddenly down so i went to do my hwk. mommie accompanied me then later i fell aslp in her arms (: woke up ard 6 plus and continued using the computer. had crabs for dinner,together with kor + mommie (: hehes.

i miss my dear soo much. ): he's now at jeffrey's hse. =/

there's still lessons on monday and band on friday..another two band meetings on monday and wednesday` what a hectic schedule. -.- bussy weeekk. jess is coming to my hse tml!. for studys..lolss..` hope both of us can concentrate!. yeppss.

2004-11-04T19:44:00.000+08:00

blardy hell. i'm down with fever + sore throat + flu again,it always happen after i went under the rain. -.-

So many things happened for the past week,i shan't not mention about it anymore. Dearie and I were fine now,after sorting out things ytd. I don't know whether i'm selfish to make such a decision but I know it's already a mistake to let them keep in contact. I don't want to go through such a torture again,after having a taste of it for the forth time. =/ Maybe you're puzzled about the past two entries,but don't care about it anymore. It's just purely a girl's mood.

Btw,how's the cca concert on friday?. nice?. How's the band performance?. lolss. I was pretty nervous and dishearted that day when bel + jess + mommy + hsin + wen told me about irwin's thingy. I kept my eyes on sir and my band seniors =) lolss. Wanna thank Choonwei for encouraging me,yeahs. He tagged bel's board but not mine. -arghs- After performance,got stuck in school because of bel. So me + jess + hsin had lunch first,before proceeding to hsin's house for a movie. We watched White Chicks there,that show is so damn funny. lolss. =) After that,me + jess + mommy had a nap in hsin's room,while bel + hsin were playing with nail polish. lolss. On saturday,supposed to meet bel + jess at 8.30am. hehes,but i overslept. Took a cabbie down to serangoon mrt station,then meet them. blehss. Travelled all the way down to dhoby ghaut,then walked to starhub centre. after sending bel into the examination hall,jess + me went to mac. We .studied for quite sometime,bel finished his exam at ard 11.30 lidat bahs. So we walked to orchard,saw the singapore idols. =) walked around and took pics,then we went to hsin's house to watch another movie. hehes,we can't find the sec 4 books so we went to her house. lolss. watched the day after tomorrow,freaking nice manx. went off to meet dearie in the evening,saw somethings that i'm not supposed to see. haishx. that fucking msg sparkled another quarrel between us. went to jess house and cried,of cause he sent me there. I was holding back my tears terribly,don't know what i am supposed to do. Played with jess's guinea pigs,then used her laptop before returning home. Went home,went online and then i cried badly again. haishx. These few days when i went back for extra lessons,was damn fucking pissed off when she keep appearing in front of me. I hate her,i really do,ever since last saturday. Even cried when i saw her on tues,damn idiotic. I don't know why i cried over her,but my tears were uncontrollable. emotions overwhelmed me for that day,unable to concentrate at all for that day. =/ geex ,ever since last saturday

Today's lessons started at 10.40am cause' mr tan has a course today so he can't give us lessons =) woke up at 8am when jess sms-ed me that yingqi they all were in school today. -.- I rushed down to school,to see how they were coping. They were told to wash up the music store. lolss. lame lehss`- I walked to mac,to meet justin + weiqi + matt + kevin + joanne. desmond arrived a lil later -.- lols. cause we called him and woke him up. had my lemon lime juice there. yeahs. lolss. chatted and we created this tea specially for desmond. lols. It's so damn digusting when matt acutally spit into it. yuckss. But before we can present it to desmond,the cleaner took it away. lols. so damn lucky`. Justin + Weiqi + Kevin + Matt went to play bball outside school, joanne + me stayed behind to accompany desmond. then walked to the bball court,saw lotsa of 3i peeps there. lols . all wanna late for social studies lesson. We walked into the class late,but mr paul didn't scold us lehss. =) social studies lesson was lil bore,we were eating snacks and mr paul confiscated all of it. -arghss- after lesson,had lunch with hsin before going for band. Was pissed off by mingshan during practice,i'm gonna get a tape recorder and then play for her every practice. -arghs-

Went home with hsin,then was raining heavily when i was on the bus. I reached home a lil drenched,was feeling so cold. Mommie gave me warm water and hugged me. lolss. Then had lunch,mommie fed me lehs. =) lolss. Mommie tucked me in,then i slept all the way till 6. mommie woke me up in a funny manner,lolss. she keep whistling,then when i opened my eyes,she said it's the hamsters. lols. so cute arhs,woke up with a fever. -arghs- so i was like so sick,had dinner with kor. =) now watching singapore idol. then followed by champions` i hate yilin.

Wanna thank all those for showering me with care and concern for e past few days,being there for me and of cause lending me their ears + shoulders for me.
- My sotong sisters, [ jess + bel ] for accompanying me,cheering me up,talking me out..
- My "parents", [ deex + yun ] for cheering me up and lending me your ears.
- My brothers, [ justin + eugene ] for allowing me to vent my anger on them and giving me advices.
- My girlfriends [ emma + steph ], emma for showing me concern and steph a hug after she saw me cryin' =)
- My budd [ ruey shyan ], for accompanying late in the nights when i couldn't slp. and also talking me out of my depression.
- My friends, [ qiujin + baoman ] showing me care. =D

lalalas. Thank God for sending them here,right beside me. Showing me lotsa care and concern whenever i'm down.`~ Great angels of my life.

there's still school tomorrow,will only stop at ard 10nov =/ Nick already booked class chalet,which is on the 16 - 18 dec. But i will only be turning up on the 16 cause' i'm flying to bangkok on the 17th morning. Be back only on the 20th. =) lolss. Band will also be having band camps, but not sure when is it =D

I'll stop here. Gonna start working hard this holidays to prepare for my stressful life next yr. =)

2004-11-01T16:18:00.000+08:00

i hate myself larhs.*

fuck!!!

haish.
i dunno what i'm thinkin'.
i dunno what i shld do.
i dunno what i can do.
i dunno what i am supposed to do.

why is she causin' us to quarrel times and agn?
why is she comin' in between us?
why must she be the one?
why must she like him?
why must she be his godsister?
why can't she just stop comin' into our lives!!!!
why must she send him such a msg?!.

she said she has her life and we have our life. but yet why she is still interfering into our life?!

he said both of us are tired. i know. but can't he just stop makin' me so jealous. i'm gettin' hurt through all these jealousy going on.
i can't control my feelings.
you think it's all right for her to send such a msg to you,then i shall make others send that to me. see how you feel. do you actually understand what i'm going through now?!

wo de xin hao tong hao tong. ni ming bai marx?!. all you do is to scold me. ask me what i want.?! what i want is unreachable. i want a sense of secure from you!. can you give me that?!.

i want to think it this way cause' i can't think of other ways to think?!.
i'm angry. so are you.
you admitted that you are angry because i'm jealous or i din tell you anything so you din msg me for the entire day.

i dunno what u are thinking. i really dunno.

nobody understands what i'm feeling now and going through...NOBODY!

my jiemuis + di's + friends cheered me up. asked me to move on and believe you.
others din say any thing to me. but i just believed my own eyes!. i saw that msg kaes.

fine.
i'm gonna be a FLIRT from now onwards.!!

i'm gonna breakdown lers. i can't concentrate. i can't do anything.
can just someone help me.?!

i dun wan her to snatch you away.
I DUN WAN!.

can someone just help me?..............!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

dear. i'm sorryx.

2004-10-26T21:22:00.000+08:00

haish.

my voice is unheard. why!.

i'm not the mood to do anything anything for no use.
i hate myself so much. why am i such a useless person?!.

haish.

today is dearie + dardar's de 2nd month. times really files.

my class got one retain. saddenx.-`

i'm not going to collapse my pure sciences. i'll thrive harder.`

i really hate myself.

why is it so?!.

i wanna give everything up.
i wanna die.

haishx.!

2004-10-25T13:42:00.000+08:00

i'm here to blog agn =)
lolss.

i succeed at my third attempt!. =D i'm not a failure`-

wad did i do ytd? oh yahs, i was supposed to go to ting's hse. but nick told me to go jas hse instead` hmms, ting didn't turn up because she went to visit her grandpa. =) filial girl lehss. stupid nick say meet at 2,then i walked out of hse at 2 =) hehes,called him but he didn't answer that call. he called back and he said he's still at home so i told him to take a cabbie down. lolss. he really did manx. we stayed in jasss room and "discuss". nick and soowen were playing,jass and karina were laughing and me slping on the floor. =) lolss. so lame,we called sianrui and yun to ask for help to book the chalet but we can't contact yun lehss. haish. so we just slacked there.` we played net big 2 =) hehes,till ard 4 lidat. i left cause' i neeed to accompany daddie and kor to go marketing.

i sort of ran home cause' kor told me that he and daddie is leaving soon. but by the time,i reach home. daddie still in the room there watching tv. -.- walaos. watched ghost story with kor till abt 4.30 then daddie came out of the room. we went to hougang point to get lotsa stuff cause' daddie wanted to eat steamboat. we bought alot of things lehs,then i let kor carry most of it. lolss. reach home,then i lied on the sofa. msged dearie till i fall aslp. =) hehes. dinner was ready at abt 6plus.

we started eatin' alot of things, daddie took mommie's abalone and eat nors. lolss. then later so coincident,mommie came back to change her clothes cause' she going out with her friends. so we were like trying to eat finish all the abalone in case she sees it. lolss. all trying to destroy evidence.` so funny/. we eat for 2hr plus lehs. walaos,so damn full siax. kor and i keep walking ard to digest our food. cause' daddie keep asking us to eat. -.- lolss. after dinner,we watched tian xia wu shuang. lolss. so lame lehs that show. stupidd.! =)

now listenin' to deex de singing. lolss. so funny + cute *

continue. i went online ard 10plus, chatted with lotsa pple. then the com so damn laggy nors. i see liaos,damn dulan. haish. i cried for 3 times last night.` i'm so weakk. first time was something personal. second time was abt this korean romance story published online. third time was over windstruck. geex`. saw bel online and she ps me =( lolss. i acc kor watch soccer at ard 3 lidat,then i doze off lehs. hehes,he woke me up lehs. =) hehes. then finally i slpt at 5 lidat. lolss. that's how i succeed =D

this mornin' woke up ard 10 lidat bahs. waited for kor to wait up,then he this stupid pig till now haven wake up. i waiting for him to cook cheese prata for me lehss. walaoss. then now i'll be taking 2 in 1 meal, breakfast + lunch. dearie these few ddays in a bad mood,haish. i don't know why. haish.

acutally planned to go out with hsin today de nors. she damn piggy. slp till 12plus nors!. geex. then later she coming over to my place to combine practice =) hehes,got nth to do. then i practise alone like very lonely lehss. =( haishs.

i'll stop here. haish.

2004-10-24T11:09:00.000+08:00

i failed again at the second attempt. so lamex*

i'm gonna try again tonight. =)

had a tirin' day ytd. keep running here and there~ woke up ard 8plus in the morning,called ting but she didn't pick up the phone. -.- went out for lunch with my family. bought some fruits and soya curd home for desert. =D hehes. msg ting then she ask me go hsin de hse` i went there,on the way there..it was raining so heavily..~ hehes,then i asked hsin to bring umbrella out for me =) then i walked to her hse,my jeans wet cause' i step into a puddle of water. hehes,borrowed her pants and wear~ =) stayed there with ting for quite sometime before proceeding to my hse.

accompanied ting go to the ntuc near my place to look at renliang. lolss. then he so dao,dun wanna talk` they bought dinner and ate at my hse. eat finish lers,go jasss de hse. jasss and qirui go chomp chomp buy food eat so we sat in her hse there with her family. her sister so cute nors,then ting keep playing with her barbie dolls. sso funny siax..`jass they all came back ard 7plus then we started the dicussion. till ard 9 lidat,me and hsin left first cause' we need to go find deex. actually is hsin go de,then i go along nors.

we took a cab down to find her`reach there ler,dee dun let us go out. make us stuck outside the house kena bitten by mosquitoes.` then somemore so scary lorhs,we keep hearing strange sounds lehss. then we saw deex de room light suddenly off by itself while deex is already talking to us outside. walaos,then me and hsin run very fast siax. we went down to 7eleven there to buy drinks then later go back to her hse. she there keep laming with us. we left ard 11 when hsin de papa come fetch her. then she send me home. =) reach home ard 11plus. so scary + dark nors.

chatted with hsin and jun online. dear slp so early siax. =( then hsin offline left jun. he say brb,then nv be back de lorhs! just lidat ps me online =( so evill...! then i online till 1plus lidat. msg budd then he asked me to call dee de hp. i called her. we chatted till ard 3plus lidat,then i fell aslp. lolss. den they put down the phone bahs.` hehes.this morning woke up ard 6plus then realised i fell aslp siax. =/ slpet back till ard 9plus. online chatted with jun + nick + yun + justin. so evil alrhs they. all one by one ps me. except budd and dee,hehes.` =)

later going out agn to ting de hse. =) hehes. so good arhs,i nv go to her new hse before lehss. blehss.` i'll stop here.

bye. takkaire.

2004-10-23T10:02:00.000+08:00

i'm so useless`. i can't ton last night-.

went up to my room ard 1plus cause' daddie kan wo. stayed upstairs,lookin at my band scores and listening to my mp3 player using a torch light cause' my maid can't sleep with the lights on. i stayed on the bed,till ard 2 lidat. was thinking that i sleep for 1 hr lidat then later wake up,by the time i woke up daddie wld be aslp lers. hehes,then i set alarm at 3.30 lidat. it rang,then my maid off it. i knew it rang,but i still went back to sleep till this morning. -.- geex!!!

=( so sad. tonight i try agn. i don't care!

so sians. now only chatting with choonwei and justin` choonwei promised to come back on friday and he came back just to watch us play lehs!. lols,i told him i scared,then he say he will be beside me ask me dun scare =) to me,i take that the concert i'm playing is for my band seniors. cause' it may the last time they will be seeing us in school performing.` so i'm taking this as a farewell gift to them,i will play my best for ya all =)))

just taken my breakfast.` so full. dearie just now msg me,he said he's now fishing with jun they all. haish. ytd he din msg me good nitex then go slp lers.` make me wait for his msg till so long,i thought he bad mood agn lehss. haish-.

deex not online.
dearie not online.
mommy not online.
hsin not online.
jun not online.
bel not online.
jess not online.
budd not online.

oinks-* all slping!. so piggyx.
so saddd. why i online,then nobody online. then when they online,i not online.!`. no fate siax.

hehes. later going ting's hse =) yeahss. to discuss abt class gathering de thingy then can also play there. llalaas.

gonna watch spirited away =) hehes. budd burned for me long ago de. =D takkarie.`

2004-10-23T01:02:00.000+08:00

i want to ton. hehehes *grins*

lolss.
last night slept ard 2 lidatx. was busy with the band thingy,had to copy out baritone sax de notes from the conductor score. =/ copy till i dozed off in my room lehss. hehes,after that actually wanted to ask kor to ton with me but we din cause' i have band today. i don't wanna fall aslp during band. hahas. i overslept this morning,mommie woke me up then i panicked. o.0

school was all right today,still tied down by lotsa of band practice. intensive practising of songs cause' of the concert,oh yeahs. sir is conducting =) somehow persuaded him to help us conduct cause' most of the songs,i don't know how to come in on my own so i need his help. today,my playing like shit lidatx. i don't know what i'm playing,most of time i was testing mingshan whether she can count the rest bars anot. in the end she can't,yingqi helped me cover up today =/ since when did she become so good larhs. world is changin'` oh yahs, today bel nv come to school lehss. lolss. she pregnant liao larhs,vomit at home.` =x the band seems normal without her ard,but not for me. hehes,cause no one pei me lame liaos. then also cannot kajiao herx. during concert,me+jess+bel will be sitting at the corners lers =) yeahss.

i passed my physics overall. wth,so heng. i expected myself to score better,or rather get at least a B grade. haishx. disappointed. school was sucky,my stomach cramps are killin' me and i'm mostly sleeping in class. =) had chinese lessons,mr ng went on abt our holiday assignments. durin' chem,ms yap was saying abt our standards and so on. lolss. then we had early recess,cause' we had to attend this english workshop. before going up to the seminar room,ms yap caught us wearing ankle socks. [-_-'l] durin' workshop,the guy explained to us the process of printing newspapers and so on. brief us on his work experiences as life reporter and so on larhs. he still said he wanted to leave a whole page of newspaper for us to do whatever we want cause' he wanted to nurture us as future journalists. =x mrs er was grining from ear to ear. wth. after that,we went back to class. slacked for the entire 3 periods cause' mr tanhn nv come lols. justin+daphne+me were recapping our primary school lives =) yeahs. so much fun back then.

after school,went straight to band with jess. the pain was unbearable,was feeling totally restless. then my band juniors were worried and they thought i shi lian or meditating. [-_-'l] recruits got their uniforms and then band practice started. lalalala~ after band,walked out of school with dearr+jun+hsin+yingen. saw this huge huge dog in black and white,so scary nors. look like monster lidat,keep wanting to disturb others. o.0. don't dare to go near it so i keep stopping to let the dog move first. haishss. hsin+jun went another way so left me+dear+yingen. yingen went to meet his beloved gf,so me and irwin walked to 315 there. =) i thought he didn't wait for me after school cause' he said his mother wanted him to reach home early. hehes,was kinda surprised when he waited for me siax =) happy lehss.

kor so idiotic,now slp liaos. *oinks- he said he wanna watch van helsigh?. [spelled this way?!] hehes,then just now he want to watch wishing stairs. but i want to watch singapore idol and championx. he die die also don't let me watch still quarrel with me lorhs. so idiotic` by the time wishing stairs do finish,is already 9.45pm lers. then he let me watch championx. what the fuck lorhs. then after that,watched fate twisters. yeahs. last espisode lehss.`lolss. so nice. >.<>maia got out of the competition lers.

this week so happy siax, like everyday also got accompany him =p nxt tues,is our 2nd month lers =) but i'm having rehearsal and practice on that day. cfm end very late de. =( saddenx. haishss. but nvm,still got our 3rd month. 3rd month,i must pei him liaos. hehes. i feel so xingfu lehsss. i miss my dearie`.

2004-10-21T20:31:00.000+08:00

hmms. long time nv update lerrrs.!

i've got a new friendster account : xheartxwhispers@hotmail.com
feel free to add me there =)

geex.
these few days,i'm stuck up with lotsa band practices. cause' there's a cca concert on the 29th. so here we are rushing thru the songs now`. sadden yeahs?. we prepared 7 songs in all,hope to cheer them up not to bore them =) there's practice tml agnx. so tirin'. i missed my band seniors,how i wished the o's faster finish then they can be back together with us. i won't feel so lonely,playin' the flute myself. =(

tues. it was rainin' cats and dogs`. i was totally drenched when i reached home,i went to s11 with hsin and wen to eat my bohpian!. hehes. then later went home with dearie,was feelin' so damn cold in the bus. lolss. reached home,lied on the sofa and fell aslp.` woke up by my maid,and i was feelin' a lil hot. geex, i'm down with flu and slight fever. had my med and msg both jamie and irwin that i couldn't go out lers. was feelin' so weak and giddy~.
=( bleahss. slept for the entire day,hehes. so shiok siax.! wed. actually planned to go out with weiqi they all but justin they all have training. so lame nors,training in the morning and i have band in the morning. we can go out in the afternoon what`so blurr de loh. then i slacked the entire afternoon,slpt thru the whole afternoon cause' kor don't wanna let me use the com.

dearie has been so sweet =) hehes,he accompanied me to school for the past two days. so nice yeahs. ! ms lee talked to me abt our relationship. it kinda made me so upset over it and i talked to dearie. he cried,haish. my fault.` but just hope that both of us will carry on fine,i will help him with his studies and also do my own revision doing the holidays =) whatever it is,i won't give him up =)

results!. i'm kinda disappointed with it. =/ failed only one subject and my highest grade was only a2. i passed my english but failed my amaths badly. the rest i scored C's. darn it. when school reopens,i'm tied up with revision tests every single week.` alternate amaths and emaths.- sadden isn't it. so i better buck up during the holidays!. =)

watchin' singapore idol!`. hehes. idiot sister,so damn idiotic. everytime insult daphne. humphhs. she only cares abt slyvester. lalalalas~
lolss.

i miss my dearie. haish. he promised me a testimonial ytd when i created the new account,but now his com spoil cannot write. then i asked others to wait for him to write ler then can write =x hehes. i'm waitin'~.

stupid justin xiaodi,today in school make me angry. keep copying my actions lorhs,so fedup. my fringe short,then he keep xue wo touch fringe. -.- humphss.` lalalalas.

i'm bored.
wish luck to budd and deex for their o's two weeks later =)
jiayous~.~

2004-10-18T16:25:00.000+08:00

hehes. i cut my hair ytd =) hehes. fringe so damn short lorhs but my hair looks thin nowx. first person i saw is jess,my hao jiemui nv laugh. mommy nv laugh. then hsin+wen+bel laugh nors. idiott,this kind of friends. -sobss- humph. hehes,they say i look like small kiddy when i was sec 1 that time =x. lolss. walaos. nbm,i wait. my hair will grow long de!. humphhhss.

hmmms. i'm so tireddd. =(

i don't dare to sleep last night` cause' of the stupid show,dawn of the dead. damn digusting and scary show. stupid show that makes me don't wanna sleep. i scare of zombies now!. =( kor larhs. bluff me, he keep asking me to watch. cause' after watching the cinderella story still got time before setting off to my grandma's place. so i watched nors,then at night continue watch. =( made me dun dare to sleep,keep opening my eyes big big to beware of zombies. hehes. so stupid. then this morning woke up at 5.30am cause' the so called nightmare start at 6.37am. walaos. i normally wake up ard 6.30am plus a lil lai chuang so i ask mommie wake me up at 5.30am. so tongku lehss. idiottt. stupid show! bring me so much misery.

today is officially the last paper. cme paper,don't know how to do dunno what fundamental liberties. shit manx,actually wanted to study so i take my cme book and read. then kor larhs,ask me to watch show till i nv study. idiott. then so qiao i nv bring back one of the book so i give up studying. msg-ed steph to help me bring tml then she say she throw away lers. lolss. chinese paper 3,my stomach so pain siax. then i anyhow do..after exam,rush to the toilet immediately nors. walaoss. after that,go mac with mommy. we eat breakfast there,then go heartland. at mac there,ordered lemon lime juice. woahs. hehes. so nice lehs. then later take bus go heartland mall. hehes. reached there lers bought jasss de prezzie. =) then walked ard,saw stairway to heaven de vcd!. hehes. so ex lehss..$40..~ walaos, dunno how long i can save to buy thatx. =( hehes. walked till halfway,got stomachache agn!. walaoss. second time lehss!. hehes,after toilet. we continued walking..we so stupid. walk one big round to go take train. walk till leg pain siax. slacked in the train for 45 mins lidat bahs,walking to int that time. dearie msg me say his exam finish lers. so i can go meet him,then i walked till the multi storey carpark there. then he say he at int lers. hehes. walked back to int agn. =) hehes. so stupid. whole day me and mommy keep walking extra distance de. lolss. meet dearie ler,mommy de bus gang hao come so she go. jun also go lers. so left me and dearie. hehes,i keep saying him and jeeboon =x so funny. on the way home,my eyes wanna close dun wanna close lidat. hehes,then dearie keep making me luff.

hehes. just now slept for 1hr plusplus at the living room when i was watching my show till halfway then i doze off. =) hehes. dearie msg me ask me to slp then say if zombies come find me ask them go find him. hehes. =x so sweet horx =) hehes. woke up then i so hungry..~ nv eat lunch lehss. then cook maggie mee till halfway,mommie called ask me go down take food from her. lolss. she can read my mind siax. then i bring up liaos,mommie called agn ask me to take out vege from fridge then i take nors. so qiao,kor came back then saw that paacket of food. he go take and eat still argue with me =( then now i no food eat. can only eat maggie mee then so spicy,i eat a lil then throw away lers. =( haish. now so damn hungry.!

kor snatched my food =( geex.
i miss my dearie. don't know what's he doing now.?!
why nv online de..
missing him badly..
stomach growlin' loudly...~ =x

stupid mr wan and jun influence my dearie.!. humphss.

2004-10-16T21:19:00.000+08:00

i'm boreddd.

daddy go ride bike. justin go bathe.! gee. dearie at chompchomp with jun they all. =( and i can't msg.

haishss. just now sign into dearie de msn account and tok to dee they all..then mr wan talk to dearie,then i told him i joanna,then he say i anyhow do the physics paper de. =( so sad lehss. i where got anyhow do larhss. idiottt. haishss.

just now slept from 3.30 to 6 lehss. omg,i'm so piggy =( don't know why i can sleep so long..i like nv dream of anything lehss?. aiyohss. dreamless sleep. just now meet dearie that time,i placeed a two dollar note into his wallet. hehes,then i thought he don't know [-_-'l] he say he wanna kip it,hehes..i monday take and fold then give him =) hehes.

kor watching soccer now. later watching cinderella story with him..hehes..~ hmms,yeahs. monday going out with mommy go buy pressie =) long time nv go out lers. after that,go back school meet dearie =) i miss him so much now. also don't know why =( love sick liao ler larhs. so sadddd.

aiyohs. i restart my pet lers. =) long time nv play tamagotchi ler lehs..aiyohs..my baobei tamagotchi. hehes. so childish horx. i'm so young..~ hehes. =)

i'm scared of my results. haish. this time don't know why so scare,what if i really retain cause of my english sub.?!. haishss.

2004-10-16T14:54:00.000+08:00

a nice sat free from studies =)

can't msg that much lers,my hp bill gonna burst. if really burst,mommie say she will cancel my line =( sobss.

slept at 12plus at the sofa,kor was watching his scary shows on the com. then he didn't wake me up,i woke up ard 2plus. then i say we go upstairs,he don't want..ten mins later..~ don't know drag how long,then i give him stupid face then he laugh. hehes,so stupid. dearie ask me slp before 1,then 1 o'clock he msg me. hehes,budden i slp lers. then he say i slp nv tell him~. hehes. this morning woke up at 9 lidat then msg him. started tidying my room for a while,then later i went to bathe. meet dearie =) hehes.

dearie now fishing with eugene they all. just now,we went steph's block there sit sit. ask steph to bring down the windstruck de vcd,then she keep laughing say what fishing is for ah beis de. lolss. still ask me go with them,suitable for me [-_-'l] lolss. lame siax she. asked dearie buy lime juice for me just now. hehes. he dun have then buy orange and lime de. hehes. aiyohs. i changed all his hp de profile =)

so sianx sia. nth better to do. i wanna go slp lers. so bored and tired,gonna slp in kor's room since he's not back =) my room is in a big mess with all the dust flying around. geexx.

good nitex-`

*budd and deex arhs. better study horx!. hehes. 18 days to O'levels. i help u two countdown~ =) jiayou horx.

2004-10-15T23:37:00.000+08:00

lolss. FINALLY!

end of yr exams are finally over*
no mugging for at least two weeks!. but now it's the sec 4s turn to mug =)

geex!. it's really scary in the hall. the feeling is totally different in the classroom especially when i sit beside clement and that idiot* hmms,can say all my papers are sucky. i will fare badly for most of my subjects,i forgot everything when i enter the hall. =( haishx. i passed my physics! but it's borderlinely. haish!!!. i studied hard for it but yet haish. how disappointing can it be ?!. hmms,but i'm worried most is my english. whether i get promoted or not,depends on that subject. hmms,i hate the school for arranging two such subjects together. amaths and chem paper. how could they!. both subs need alot alot of memorisinggg. but no point pondering over it lers. it's over!. what's done can't be undone.

hmms. it's been long since i've updated. last yr i can blog everyday even if it's exam period but yet nowx =x hehes,i'm lazy..
my new maid's name is Nunung =) hehes. stupid hsin dunno how to pronounce then anyhow pronounce de!. lolss. i don't know why i'm feeling sympathetic towards her. i know mommie is always scolding her..but i don't understand why she is always comparing the new maid and old maid. don't understand her..~ haish. kor these few days keep studying with me. =) amazing siax,he got good grades for his prelims!. so damn idiot,he keep haolian to me siax. lolss. stupid. can't study in my own room now cause nunung is sharing the room with me =(

hehes. today after exams,went central with mommy they all. they acc me go buy lime juice. i'm addicted to that lehss. die liao ler larhs,hehes. caught up alot of times with mommy =) dearie arhs,today ps me. he was at the basketball court,then i walked past he msg me say he saw me. humphh. he played bball with xiaodi they all. hehess. reached home,had lunch and used the com. chatted with budd+xiaodi+felix online,budd asked me abt my exams. hehes,xiaodi was laming with me and felix was asking abt my life. =) hehes. chatted till 4plus,then kor came home. watched vcd with him, Dodgeball. it's funny. hehes. after that,slept for a while at the sofa till 7plus for dinner. saw msgs. geex. what cca concert? .my holidays are deprived =( but nbm,can touch my flute lers!.

xiaodi de thingy. at first he said he dun wanna tok to me lers. cause he thinks that it's pretty unfair for pple to say that to me cause we are close,but now things sshld be all right. as long as me and him have a clear conscience,then all right lers. hmms!. =)

tml need to tidy up my room!. =) hahas. all those dust and books are piling up everywhere. hehes. mommie bringing me for haircut on sunday =) going my grandpa's birthday celebration on sun too. hehes. i'll stop here =) bye. takkaire peeps.

2004-10-09T08:11:00.000+08:00

haishx. the matter aren't rest yet..

things' are gettin' from bad to worst. jeff and i are quarrelling now. dearie and i are fine now,after almost one week of coldwar+quarrels. and he and wanying are still godsister and godbrother. what am i doing?!. haish. if he say they are clear,i have to trust him right. =) hmms,not sure abt wanying's side. my sixth sense is still there. jen's side,she is the one who started hating me so why can't i hate her too?. geexxx.

wanna thankx all my loved ones for staying by my side during this week of hell.
deex + budd : specially came down to my place to give me advices and chat.
bel + jess : for cheering me up in school =p
mommy + hsin + ting : sorting matters out for me.

hmms,huan nan jian zhen qing bahs. =) hehes. stairway to heaven,the show do finish lers!. =( so sad. i cried lehss. hehe,then everytime i saw shuwen,i will call her jingshu!. crazyy me,but i'm gonna save up for that vcd =p yeahsss.!

exams have started ytd. chinese paper was quite easy but normally i say easy means i'll get very bad marks =x hehes. don't plan to get a a1 for it but at least a b3 bahs. or else mommie will kill me..~ english paper is on monday!!!. my gawd,if i fail that..i will have to retain or drop normal!. i hate both choices. haishss. will be taking papers in the hall from tues onwards. it seems so serious.. =) hehes.

woke up so damn early cause' i sleep early last night..wasn't in the mood to study so i went to sleep. this morning,i woke up and i slipped and fall down the whole flight of stairs. daddie and mommie rushed to halfway of the stairs where i fell. daddie from the room and mommie from the kitchen and they helped me up. geex,it hurts..my back+hip there still hurt a lil..~ =(

my new maid is coming later!!!. hahas. yeahss..i'm away from household chores from today onwards!!. lolss. then i can concentrate on my studies. pathetic me* unable to study cause' of all those household chores. hehes.

have to get started on my emaths. planned to score an B on that =) bye. and takkaire.~

2004-10-06T14:59:00.000+08:00

so many things happened nowadays. am i in the right or in the wrong?.

all i've written is all the from the bottom of my heart. if it's offensive to you,i'm sorry.

btw,
am i in the wrong to get jealous?
shld i be feeling guilty for causing all these to happen?
am i supposed to let him go?

i feel so miserable now. just because of this jealousy word. me and irwin somehow quarrelled again on saturday,i refused to take his calls and reply his msgs cause' i know we're gonna quarrel agn over her_ it's the third time,i just can't believe it. i read her_ blog,realised that she_ is always looking for irwin after school. every single blog entries of hers_ has irwin's name in it. i can illustrate the picture in my mind thru all her words. hw close are they together.

haish. she's the only one sad,isn't it?. she cried cause of this matter isn't it?. then what abt the tears i'm shedding now.? crocodile tears?.
i'm feelin' helpless,get it? if u tink i mean to let them break ties,let it be. no matter what it is,i'm in the wrong. i've caused both of them to suffer such a fate. i'm the one who caused them to break ties. i'm the one who caused them to avoid each other. while she's the pathetic one,taking all the hardships,sorrows and sadness for losing her beloved godbrother.

i'm just an idiot who will make my dearie upset and worried.

what do i get in return for getting jealous?.
-a pool of tears.
-guiltness
-angryness
-helplessness
-a broken heart
but most importantly,a stab in my heart by my sister. because his girl is her_gd friend,he hated me. he said i was the one who always made irwin sad. i'm a flirt. i'm only supposed to have one male friend which is irwin. haish. is this what i get in return after 8 months of friendship with you?. do u know how hurt am i to realise that you are the one who actually backstabbed me because of jen?!. u may think it's funny,but to me i'm not. i'm a human with feelings!. anonymous,this is what i called backstabbing. no more promises+craps+bullshiting from you anymore. this is what u called jiemuiis right?. who promised me not to ps me cause of stead?. who promise not to ps this jie of his?.

haish. pple get angry after reading this. pple think i'm acting after reading this. whatever it is,i'm unable to take anymore things now. it's too much for me to bear. so tongku..nobody can help me...

i'm sorry,dearie.
sorry wanying. sorry jeffrey. sorry everyone.

everything is my fault. irwin and her_can resume their relationship..~ i wun say anything from now. everything will be kept inside my heart. cause' i know when i spell it out,every thing will be in a mess. i will cause many pple to be sad or what so ever.

i can't take it anymore. pls. no more hardships for me.

2004-10-03T17:03:00.000+08:00

haish. so long nv update lers. 8 days in all~
my maid left already =(
haish. i cried bitterly at the airport..can't control my tears` now all the household chores are divided among all of us. geex. i didn't do any revision cause i'm busy with all the chores. haish.

monday 27o9o4 :
hmmms. stayed back in school for wait for irwin,together with bel and jess. they felt aslp while waiting,so when irwin released from his remedial..bel and jess was still slping. then we walked out of school together,bel keep hugging the lamp post. [-_-'l] went for english tuition,all the way till 7.30pm. so tiring,went home and studied for my maths mock exam till 11 lidat,i rmbed i got ss test too. -blehs- so i studied ss all the way till 12 plus.

tuesday 280904 :
hmms. woke up at 5 lidat to memorise ss thingy abt industries. geeex. then after school,had mock exams. blehss. the paper is so damn difficult,i don't know how to do paper two =( jeff there very noisy,made me have headache. haish. after that,went for tuition. reach home ard 8,saw irwin they all under my block. [-_-'l] they tout i have tuition at home,then i went home to take a bathe and had dinner. went down to meet steph they all. played ard with candles and sparks. =) hehes. so fun and i blowed alot of bubbles. hehes. stupid yongkiat's brother called me auntie cause yk asked him to say so!. went home ard 10plus,aacc irwin to the busstop and we missed 2 buses. reached home and ate mooncakes agn..~ hahas..

wednesday 290904 :
lettme think. i forgotten lers.

thursday 300904 :
teeyue* birthday!!!.
lolss. didn't hit her 15 times. i'm so good =) school was usual..`after school,rushed home to eat my lunch and send my maid to the airport. reached the airport at 4.30,ate burger king and then i started crying. having hiccups so i ate the burger with the hiccups,almost choke. =( then she went in ar 5.30 =((((( then i cried very very bitterly. daddie let us wait till 6.15 where the plane took off. went to swensons for ice cream,me and daddie had banana split and kor+jie had mint stuff. i forgotten i got tuition at 7 =( then the tuition was cancelled. reached home,did some hwk and i went to bed early.

friday o110o4 :
childrens' day!. lolss. yeahss. hahas. i'm not a kid anymore =(
school was ok,ms yap treat us better nowadays. no longer scolding us as much as in the past and she praised us for our good behavior =) lolss. after school,complete my chinese compo together with the rest outside the classroom at the benches there. then irwin finished his oral,actually preparing to leave then he say he wanna do his d&t stuff. so he went there,i went back to look for mr ng they all. so we had some chat there,helped kangquan and beautrice. after that,helped kangquan to copy maths questions!. i felt aslp while copying,lolss. then did my chem worksheet. actually wanted to look for ms yap but then i don't dare to call her out then just nice raining,so i went to foyer with kangquan. asked yongkiat to help me with my chem so he taught my reluctantly!. irwin came and we went home. haish..

saturday 021004 :
jasss* birthday!!
lolss. called her at 12 but can't get thru her phone so i msged her.
was talking to irwin on the phone..lolss..
went for my aunt's housewarming "party" at bukit gombak there. hmms. saw hongkah sec there. lolss. BEL!
hmms. stayed there for a couple of hours. had lunch there. then we dropped mommie off at serangoon gardens. me+kor+daddie+jie went to hougang point to shop for groceries. lolss. had steamboat at night,hmms. so troublsome. need to prepare so many things. had a fast yet filing dinner. lolss. i washed the dishes,jie sweep the floor and kor mopped the floor =) lolss. yeahs. family unity and we cleaned the whole house within two hours. lolss.

today*
haish. ii'm so tired. why is he always committing the same mistake?!. =( whatever,you see this. i don't wanna care anymore. just take it i'm in a bad mood these few days. don't care abt me. if you think you've done nth wrong..let it be~ i'm sorry but i'm really tired.

2004-09-25T17:46:00.000+08:00

my day sucks today!. wtfff.

geex. slept early last night,too tired to stay up. made dearie apologised to his mother lers,hope they two are all ryte now =) tml another 26,one month since we patched up. hmms,so many things happened siax. we quarrelled for so many times..we aren't the same as before. lolss. good and bad. i've learnt to cherish more than anything else,my love for him grew deeper. hehes. but we've learnt to quarrel more nowadays. i get jealous over small small things,showed him attitude sometimes =x dearie,sorry. =) he's offline lers. attending his cousin's wedding,hmmss..then can't talk on the phone or msg each other cause' i scare his mother scold him agn =( haish. nbmx. i'll spend my time doing my tuition hwk. time will pass slowly without him. i'm signing into his account =x hehes.

btw,band kinda suxs today!. got punished in the morning,the entire band cause' some members' attire were not appropriate. did some skills and indeed,we have deteoriated. went back to band,my mood got slacken down so much since last night. played emotionless,choonwei sat beside me. then we chatted,sir made us laugh,made us angry. but i still loved the way he played the drumset =) hehes,we played so many songs. and most of the time,i was the only one in the section playing cause' yingqi and mengshan got lost halfway thru [-_-'l|] i didn't use my diaphram today,i don't know why. felt so weak so my sound sounds weirdy~ today is the last practise,so called one cause exams are approaching. geex. brought my instrument home,but think i won't be practising much or my parents will nag lers. haish. after band,got punished agn. cause' our instrument got fingerprints and only clarinet and percussion don't have fingerprints. [so coincidence horx?!] hehes,btw..i left with choonwei and mandl. walked to central,then all ps me. =( went home myself,had lunch with my family. lied on the sofa and i felt aslp. also dunno why i suddenly got headache. ate panadolss. did emaths tys. -blehs- =p

havin' mock exams on tues.! why is it sec 3s got mock exam?. i tout suppose to be next yr?. stupified. then after that,go tuition..only reach home at 8pm =( gonna miss stairway to heaven agn. haishss.

i miss my dearie. how am i gonna spend the night hours?.=( i miss everybody:
*irwin.
*suyun
*rueyshyan
*mandl
*bel
*jess
*hsin
*steph
*emma
*ting
*jasss
*eugene
*justin
*deex
*shuwen
*my andi.!

but i still miss my dearie the most. haishs.

i'll end here. stupud eugene,know i using irwin's account.~. nvmx..got good news also nv tell me this jie. this kind of di!. this kind of jie!. hsin heard it ler marx?...~

2004-09-24T22:14:00.000+08:00

hehe. it's really been long since i've last update =) lolss. i miss my bloggie so much,so tied up with my schoolwork lers or rather too busy playing. i'm feeling so guilty for not studying..-haish-

lemme think. had flag day on saturday,went ard asking for donations. lolss. we went to amk with steph cause' she wanted to see her old neighbourhood. collected quite a number of collections there,and we saw ms chan there. geex. then we headed to heartland mall,jamie they all bought steph's present then we went back to jamie's house to get another one. lolss. returned our tins at ard 12 lidat bahs,went to band for a while then go meet dearie lers. went home together =)

monday,band practice was ok bahs. i've got pms,then i got kinda of pekchek with bel =x lolss. then i didn't get to play much cause' my stomach cramps are killin' me and i can't use my diahgraph. slacked on for the whole practice,listened to my junior's playings and so on. went home with dearie agn =) lolss.

tuesdayx. hmms,i only remember i had tuition that very day. caught a flu,felt a lil feverish that morning. dearie came to fetch me after his oral and it'r raining cats and dogs. hehees.

wednesday. fever still remains as usual..went to school for chemistry test..felt so sickly..~ had sectional in school till 5plus then i went for tuition agn. haish. and i scored a b4 for it. geex. =)

thursday. hahas. i went home early to sleep =) slacked for the entire afternoon,did lotsa stuff. had a terrible headache that afternoon,so i just lied in bed for quite sometime.

friday =) that's today. my memory is gettin' from bad to worst,all i could rmb for the past week is all these. hehes. had a surprise maths mock exam today,tanhn didn't come to school for two days. geeex. lolss. no weekly maths test but got mock exam. -blehs- after school,stayed at the foyer to complete my english test assignment. mrs er so damn biased* wth,3i must complete the work by 1.30pm but 3f anything also can pass up. idiottt..make me rush thru the compo~ after completing the compo,i went for band. saw irwin they all playing soccer,he seems so sad for the entire day. btw,me and hsin walked ard the school. we keep teasing mr wan,we called his name and we hide. lolss. so stupiddd..~ waited for bel then we went to mac to look for mommy they all. stayed there till 3plus,went back to school to get my tape. [beautrice helped me record stairway to heaven =)] lolss. then later run back to mac. went to hougang mall with bel+hsin+azdrul. sent azdruk home then went back to school to look for dearie. hehes. sent bel home and walked back to interchange =) saw kodi+ms lee and kodi caught dearie's shirt tucking out then me and hsin go hide. geex. dearie acc me home,reached home quite late. no one at home except kor and my maid. haish.

just finished watching stairway to heaven! lolss. it's so nice =)))) yeahs. my maid is leaving this thurs,i'm gonna miss her muchie!. haishs. been with us since i was in primary 5. haish..now she's going back to be a deejay or a tour guide. hehes. but she say she's comin' back =)

my legs are breaking. thanks to ah beL! acc her to mrt station then walked back. [-_-'l|] lolss. but also she pon her tuition cause' of us =) such a sweetie. better dun praise her much,later her head becomes big!. lolss

2004-09-17T22:20:00.000+08:00

back for another entry =)))

i think i'm down with flu,been sneezing for quite some time. geex. dearie also down with fever.

school's fine today =) saw mr wan behind daddie's car,when i got off and he saw me..he was like kinda shocked?!. lolss. we had a sudden spotcheck in the morning,ms yap and mr wan was damn strict with us. went back to class,ms yap did a survey with us about our positive and negative points so we listed out alot of positive points. ms yap told us about our class and so on. then later lessons went on as usual,chem lesson was all ryte and i managed to understand quite a number of things.

went for recess with bel =) and she missed jessica. so bad,she isn't missing me =( lolss. btw,been spending quite sometime during this week. i'm a substitute to her cause' jess wasn't ard =x lolss. but i somehow enjoy her presence,at least there's someone who is able to boast herself in front of me. =) i like her confidence. lolss. heard that bel? =) after recess was chem agn,ms yap scolded us abt our practical books. lolss. another change =) then followed by maths test,a make up of ytd. geex. the paper was all ryte,me+justin+hsin passed our papers ard =p lolss.

after school,went to band store. dearie accompanied me to wait for bel to finish her chinese remedial. we walked ard the school,stayed at the stairway most of the time. mr lee caught us and he used a camera to take pictures [-_-'l|] sianrui was there,shouting as if nobody's business. hehes. eugene is giving birth. after that,we went to mac to look for hsin and the others. sat there for a while,mommy fed me fries. and jess dropped by and saw us =))) lolss. gave her a nice big hug,and she turned so tanned now. healthy skin colour but she has got lotsa injuries. lolss.

dearie accompanied me home =) slacked at home for a while,then went out for tuition. tuition was all ryte,the room was so sstuffyy!. blehsss. guangyi ate alot of chocolatess. hahas. he tempted me!. =( hehess. after tuition,got cards from the bookshop and then i went home.

my friendster testimonials are piling up =( stupid friendster still don't wanna help me solve my problemss. geex. 16 testimonials to approve.. =(

i'm off*. =) takkaire..~ missing my dear..~ oh yah,i'm having flag day tml ard this area. why can't we go orchard!. lolss.

2004-09-16T21:42:00.000+08:00

my house is stinking now. my fridge broke down and those frozen stuff were spoilt. -blehss- i'm can't take the smell!.

hmms. let me think,school was ok ytd except that it's my beloved girlfriend's birthday! =) Happy 15th Birthday,Stephanie!. Gave her a me to you bear and some lion thingy just to tease her. lolss. but she received quite a number of presents from others. my day was all right ytd,went for band in the afternoon but we were told to start practising only after 3.15pm. so i taught my recruit how to use diaphragm (issit spelled this way?) made her do lotsa sit ups to train up. then practised all the way till 4plus,it started raining so we keep our instruments. i stayed back with bel,looking at my dearie =) hehes,then i saw mr wan training..learning how to bat,lolss. it's so damn hilarious =x. slow motion batting de. hehees. after that,went mac with bel. saw hsin they all,then i played along with them. lolss. i walked out of mac to buy pancakes to eat,then bel thought i angry so she told hsin. then they really thought i was angry,lolss. bel asked me to carry on with the show,so i did. but i laughed in the end. saw mr foo outside mac,lolss. he still own me the pictures taken on racial harmony day and my birthday. =) walked with bel to interchange and saw him agn!. [-_-'l|] on the bus,there's this auntie sitting beside me don't let me go down the bus. so i said excuse me quite loud,then she let me go. idiott. lolss.

todayyy. didn't sleep in class =) hehes,got teased by mr wan agn. dearie hai wo de. geex.lolss. oh yah,during chinese..mr ng was busy with his stuff so i was crapping ard with justin+kevin+hsin till end of school. cause mr tan didn't come today = no emaths test! we slacked ard =) ms yap was abit off today,she keep scolding us today. cause of our behavior,our attitude and so on. hmms,but chem lessons were all ryte. not that bad,at least i didn't sleep. after school,waited for beautrice's father to fetch us to her house =) saw dearie at the foyer but he didn't talk to me =( haish. reached beautrice house then we watched stairway to heaven. gees,it's so nice. i saw the vcd at taka. $46! gawd,so ex. i'll save up for it =) s

kor wanna use the com lers,and off i go to see the results for the singapore idol thingy. i support shirim =) (issit spelled this way?!) takkaire. and i miss my dearie lotsa!.

2004-09-14T21:29:00.000+08:00

hasn't been blogging since sunday =)

i'm warning ya this is gonna be a long entry cause' i have got many many things to say. crude things real crude.

on monday,school reopened but my class seems to be quite empty because almost half the class went missing. some were absent and some went for obs =) my class is left with two councillors,kangquan and another CORRUPTED councillor wanling. we changed our places alot of times =) band was as normal. we got lectures from sir and bel,as our attitude was bad =x bel was kinda upset but she's all right after that. yingqi irritated me and i scolded her off. haish. had maths tuition after my dinner,it's a long session. after that,irwin made me feed on vinegar agn. why is that he is not sensible to my feelings. why are we quarrelling over her twice?!. i'm really tired. i stayed up till 12plus with my dad by my side monitoring my work. when i was packing my bag,i realised there wasn't any chinese period tml. wtf.

on tuesday,which is today. got scolded by my xiaomei because he thinks i'm gettin' angry over nth. i'm not angry,i'm jealous!. haish. feel so upset in school today but some other things managed to cheer me up. i passed my english oral =) but i've been sleeping alot during maths lessons. geex. went to taka with hsin after school to get steph's present. walked to many places cause' i can't decide what to buy. and that stupid xiaomei bluff me say he don't wan to go out cause he very tired. but then he went beach road with irwin they all. wth. bought what we want,then later sat in the mrt train,ate our biscults =) hehes,then later went for tuition. during tuition,hsin was so slpy. so was i. after tuition,went home and slacked till now.

been typing so much things. a mail to my gf emma. updating my blog. entertaining yinggen. teasing justin for forgetting to buy steph's present and so on.

haish. wanling's thingy. is she trying to get sympathetic support?!. how can she get supports when this involves only the both of us?! the only one who can rightfully speak up is hsin. no one else. so what's the use of asking pple to tag on her board to help her. who can help her when she doesn't even know what i'm hating her abt?!. all ryte,if she thinks nothing is wrong..so be it! don't deny things you didn't do..admit it.~ it's like so damn obvious lorhs. you think we are blind,we are deaf or we are dumb!. if you think,our friendship is gone...then gone larhs. as if i will cherish a friend who will snatch people's stead,a friend who will ps you cause' of other normal male friend,a girl who likes to be pretty all the time which is overreacting. be frank,i don't like having such a friend! go ahead,complain to others. how bad am i. influence them,but don't forget they have their own thinking. they aren't dumb or what.

a msg from someone to you :
aiyo u think u veri chio issit? kaoz everyday sit there tuck out shirt comb hair comb hair....later all drop out i laughah...then ur blog say hates freaks especially guyz...then why u anyhow go out with a guy frm other sch that u dun even know?!?! siao ah? contridict urself like siao loh.........lamer...

2004-09-12T01:10:00.000+08:00

geex. i'm bored!. really bored. dearie ps me go slp agn~`i msged him so many times. i'm still doing my chemistry notes,took a break to update my blog and make fun of some pple =))

actually planned to do my chem worksheet just now,but i forgotten abt the music awards and the final of the next big thing. lolss. so i placed my work aside =) i've to do it later in the night. pestered kor to accompany to stay up and now he's painting his stuff =)

school is reopening in one day's time. it's gonna be sad,i've not get my parents to sign my result slip =|

i've got a shock to find out my dearest cousin visited my blog. geexxx. -eyes rollin'- she has got to know my secretsss.

oh yah. my parents has gotten a new maid today cause' the current one is leaving at the end of the month. haish. my new maid is the same age as my sister. -blehx- perhaps they may be good friends =) i'm gonna miss my poor andi!!!!!

2004-09-11T11:46:00.000+08:00

my tutor cheated my feelings!. evil her,made me woke up so earlyyy =(

slpet at 2plus last night. actually planned to sleep at 4plus but i'm freaked out. all my family members went to slp except me =x even kor also ps me. hmms,then i thought irwin slp liao,so i went to slp. msged him good nitex then he replied =) hehes,he was waiting for me to slp. i thought he ps me,but he didn't.

i'm still left with my chem worksheet =)gonna complete it later. have to pass on the com to my brother soon. dearie is going out with my xiaomei and xiaodi later. lolss. hope they enjoy themselvess.

school is reopening soon. have to get started on my exams revision. another sad thingy.

joanne*
hehes. nahs,hmms. u got miss me marx?!. been quite close to ya nowadays,perhaps cause i'm sitting near ya and we always gossip alot. we used to bicker alot in the past. bu ta bu xiang shi =) yeahs. don't care abt that bitch kaes,carry on with ur life. some friends are meant to leave a footprint in ur heart but some aren't. they didn't leave their footprint but a wound for you. we're still sooooo young,cherish it. enjoy it =) takkaire.~

2004-09-10T22:35:00.001+08:00

woahs* i'm having a quarrel with that girl =)

i won't waste my entry to publicise her.

geez. i'm so bored! went down to meet jeff+steph then he keep making fun of me. had dinner quite late,daddie came back and scolded me. been slacking for the whole day long,i'm feeling so guilty now. i realised i'm not catching up things with all my friends. haish* so sorryyy

irwin*
my dearie =) sorryy for my wilfulness,glad that we're now back together agn. i miss so much,didn't see you for one day lers. you're always with ur wife. hehes,but now ur wife baoqi you cause' of another girl. but don't worry i won't baoqi you de =) must take care of yourself horx,don't fall sick. exams are approaching,must study hard kaes but don't stress yourself too hard. love ya alwayss..*_muacks.

steph*
heyx my gf =) hasn't been catching things up with ya. hope you are doing fine nowadays. another weak fella,down with sore throat. take care too. your birthday is comin' soon~ enjoy your day kaes =) oh yah,rmb to make your ic. don't forget horx. early birthday wishes to ya.

emma*
my penpal since primary four if i'm not wrong =) from letters to mails. how amazing. hehes,cause i lost her address somehow. anyway i just dropped ya a mail,reply it soon. i'm waiting =) hope you aren't getting stressed up cause' of your exams. hope your band stuff is getting on fine. all my hopes are wished on you..~ =)

tingx*
heyxxx. just had a lil chat with ya today. i was actually looking forward to go out with you all tml but too bad bestie can't make it but we'll make it out nxt time kaes looking forward agn =) hope you and ur friends are getting along fine. still having problems,just call me up =) i'm here.

jasss*
this girl here. got boyfriend,don't want sisters ler. so sad. lolss =) asked her tml but she's going out with her baobei. understable =p but anyway,me and her are really fated to be classmates after 2 yrs of torturement with her =x jk. it's been sad yet fun when i spent my past two yrs with her. we've gone through really lotsa lotsa..~ got time,ask us out kaes =)

jeffrey
this lame guy!. i've not done anything wrong yet he keep scolding me. but really wanna thank him for bringing me back to my senses. lolsss. yeah =) he always accompanying me to do things i don't wanna do. he's finally getting hardworking now. at least he made the effort to do his hwk now =) better don't praise him too much or his head will go higher..=)

budd*
hey hey. really wanna thank you for accompanying me to walk through one of the most difficult point of my life =) without you by my side encouraging,i really don't know how am i going survive during that period of time. prelims are approaching,hope you are coping on well. hmms,when you're bored or need some encouragement and also some scoldings,just drop me a msg anytime =)lolss. btw,glad that you are cheering up nowadays =)

mandl*
i don't know what's wrong with ya nowadays. or is it the problem lies with me?. i know you're avoiding me or what so ever. hope you will stop it soon. geexxx. cheer up during band. don't always pull this long face kaes.

mommy+bestie*
i almost forgotten you,but don't worry i won't =) sorryy for not being there when you needed someone to be there for ya. me and irwin are all ryte ler,so if you are still having any problems..let me know. don't hide things from me in the future kaes,no matter what mood i'm having,just let me know when you need help. i don't wish to see you wallowing in pity. if things aren't meant to be together,just let it be. don't get too upset kaes. it's his loss not urs. my mommy still have some charm =)

xiaodi*eugene
wei* this lil fella become my didi lers =) i also don't know how did we become siblings. but it's good to know him. he brighten up my day whenever i'm troubled over irwin's thingy =) he's my spy,everything i don't know de. he sure tell me de..lolss..~ always ask me not to think so much. lolss. don't think how to survive!. stupid. btw,sleeping is good habit. geex. hold hsin tight too kaes. don't let go of her ler larhs.

justin*
surprised marx! another guy who always cheer me up. sides me whenever i'm right or wrong =) hehes. he's having a phobia but don't worry,this jie won't abandon you. u promised to help me with my english,you promised so can't back out =) always ps me online de you. he's loyal bahss..lolss..pei wo pon ss test. yeahs* i still remember that =) always read my blog nv tag my board de,you better tag horx or you will get it from me =)

2004-09-10T13:49:00.000+08:00

back from oral =)

ms zavier took us for oral,i was so much relieved when i saw her. the oral was quite all right,i did freaked out at first but it was quite smooth-sailing till the last part. i mistaken the bell boy as an chauffeur =x waited for steph at the canteen,chatted with ting for a while and she left.

i slept at 3 lidat the previous night,cause i was doing my maths assignment till abt 2.30am. woke my brother up and then msg dearie. the next day,was so tiring. i couldn't get enough sleep =) then i had maths remedial,band and bbq. another killing day. dearie overslept because of the soccer match so we meet at the school bus stop. saw eugene outside school,then we went to school canteen. sat there till 9 then me and jeff went for remedial =) lolss. mr tan didn't scold us. went in there,didn't pay attention at all. i was drawing jeff's book. i did something lame,lolss. we msged each other abt lame stuff [-_-'l|] lolss. after remedial,teeyue gave me a box of chocolates =) yeahs. me and jeff ate up the whole thing..then i left for band practice. band practice was a bore. sir did alot of basic stuffs,i was so damn sleepy so i slept for a while. omg,he is so observant abt gays =))) went for lunch,queued for so damn long. got our food and by the time we sat down and eat,it's already like 12.35pm. we went back to band quite late,just a few seconds after sir reached =) lucky aren't we?! but we were panting and sweating profusely. slept for a while agn,then we went for sectional practice. taught my recruit,i somehow shouted at her then the clarinet recruit looked at me. lolss. i was really sick and tired of teaching her. i'm an impatient person!. =)

after band,called my teacher and cancelled the tuition. went home changed my clothes and went out to meet bel they all. we arranged to sit in the same bus,so bel told hsin the plate number of the bus. before going up the bus,hsin purposely walked to the front of the bus and look at the number cause she thought she took the wrong bus? [-_-'l|] lolss. we stopped bus at bishan and changed bus. sat that bus for one hr,my butt has gone numbed. fell aslp agn in the bus =) lolss. walked an underpass to reach east coast. nick they all can't start the fire because of the sea breeze. omg,we were so damn hungry and nick was making a fool out of himself. sat with hsin on the bench,then chatted abt many things. bel joined us then we sat on the beach. we left at 9.30pm cause hsin's father is fetching us back. bel at first said she wanna go kallang and take mrt home so i accompany her. then later her father offered to drop us at potong pasir because he was fetching his wife there. so bel and me took a train back,sat on 315. reached home ard 10.45pm and i missed the singapore idol results =( slept at 12plus,mommie rushed me up to sleep because i fell aslp on the sofa. daddie went back to office in the middle of the night. so saddd.

i've to get started on my hwk but first i will practice my flute =) yeahs!.

i don't care whether i'm being harsh to her. that's my opinion and what she had done was really intolerable. -bleahs-

2004-09-08T08:51:00.000+08:00

what an exhausting day.

had three activities on ytd. band+tuition+remedial. omg~ woke up at seven forty five,dearie msged me then i asked him to msg me when he reached. he replied saying i'm already downstairs,i don't want to be late =) so cute~ i rushed out of the house and then we went to school together. we went to class 4c then later he went to look for eugene. maths remedial was in a mess,mr tan scolded us for not treating this remedial seriously and i injured my finger there till it bleed =( majority of us were not paying attention at all =)) hsin was eavesdropping on steph and beautrice. whilst me,jeff and jamie were msging during class. after remedial,went for band practice. sir keep pressurising me,then i kept on laughing. hsin got too tense-up,cause' some particular things. lolsss.

went for lunch with jess+hsin+ling+wen. we were running away,but she somehow caught up with us. wtf,went to s11. bel called while we were eating,then we waited for her to come before we leave. went for sectional practice after lunch,i practised till my lips were a lil swollen and jolene didn't care abt it!. -arghs- then i just slacked ard,playing and gossiping =))) lolsss. ms chan threatened us to bring our instruments home and some of us did. so i have to practise later on =)

went to look for dearie after band. while i was walking to jeeboon's house that time,he msged me tell me to wait outside school. i called him then he said he's already outside school lers. so me and hsin walked back. sat there for quite sometime,scolded hsin for doing some senseless things. then dearie acc us walked to central. during tuition,i was sleeping =) the teacher didn't care abt me cause they were doing something not concerning us. lolss. hsin did her brainstorming on compo,the guys there were so damn pervertic!. what they thought of were all dirty stuff [-_-'l|] after tuition,dearie and eugene waited under the block there. then hsin and eugene walked away,me and dearie walked away too. waited for that darn bus for quite sometime. reached home at 8plus =)))

dearie had been such a sweetie. he accompied me for the whole day =))
chatted with him on the phone for 1hr plus and then he went to sleep. dearie,don't take those jokes to mind kaes. i'm just playing =x hehes..

watched stairway to heaven till abt 1plus. omg,that show is so damn damn touching =) after the show,i went to slp. then budd msg me whether i'm awake anot,i msged back and i called him cause' he's bored. it's been long since i chatted with him,chatted on many many things within that short half an hour. hope he's going on fine nowadays,O's are arriving so he's gettin' stressed up~. =)))

*her. what a pathetic her. i'm hating her because she is currently breaking up a couple!. wtf,don't be such a bitch to snatch your good friend's boyfriend. you can find all kind of guys but not guys who are already attached. you shld get the meaning of why we aren't talking to you. me and hsin were merely close because of her thingy. you are the cause why she is in this pathetic state. thought abt it carely,just because of a guy..you wanna lose this good friend of yours. to add on,that guy's heart isn't with you at all. even if you are carrying a torch for him,doesn't mean he will like you back. drop that thinking!. get a life and stop destroying them*. -blehx-

2004-09-06T09:53:00.000+08:00

o3o9o4
hmms. i'm unable to update my blog,so i'm typin it in here =) not i don't wanna blog horx. sad larhs.
*i hate being a rubbush bin!

now my mother is forcing me to drink some chrysanthamen tea -yucks- cause i've been eating lotsa chocolates nowadays =x
ms yap got abit crazyyy today,is she having pms or what? we had chemistry before and after recess. before recess,ms yap was praising us to skies as our class had made her proud abt the australlia competition and also abt the video thingy. and she didn't scolded us at all,smiling throughout the lesson. then after recess,she had a 360 degree change,gawd..she scolded us for the whole period even the slightest thing in the world could make her flare her temper. she scolded us for lending a ohp bulb to another class,incompleted practical book and also the workbook wasn't collected properly. [-_-'l|] lolss. had my chinese oral after school today =) i got abit nervous and i kept laughing. mr ng guided me along,and i blurted out a few english words =x

got back my results today. it suckss..i failed two subjects. but i passed my english and physics =) hehes. as usual,chinese was my best scored subject. worst was amaths*. haish. daddie and mommie was kinda disappointed abt it. - sobs- went to band store after oral,saw bel there. then we chatted for a while and we went off ard 3plus. she acc me to library to return books and borrow =) hehes,bought wrapping paper then went home lers..she went for tuition. i fell aslp in the bus,actually planning to meet dear de..but he was still in school. when he replied,it was abt 6plus ler =( then he told me mr wan followed him home. lolss,just because mr wan wanted to know more abt him. mr wan is getting' a lil psycho...

i'm hating her* -arghs- shld i mention her name? perhaps not.
wtf man. idiottt...during maths test,she put the paper on the table and copy lorhs. btw,i like steph's words : do u wanna to take the test on ur own ability or just by coping to get high marks. lols. another one was even more worst,she placed the tys on the table and copied nors. [-_-'l|]
ytd i went to mac,saw her taking away her tie just to act lian. i asked her
"can take out tie de mehs "
she say "can,why not even exams also can take out"
"but we take exams in the classroom not public"
"this call public mehs?. got other councillors mehs?"
then i pointed to one outside mac.
"aiyohs,that one also corrupted de larhs"
-bleahsssss-
another time was :
"skirt can so short de mehs"
"no larhs,i borrow this skirt de"
so damn jialat lorhs,a skirt that was so damn short. councillor somemore lehsss..gawd,then also the way she walks..-yucks-
why is it she always ask when i'm talking abt a guy. why is it a councillor could act in this way? while others get caught by having their fringe not pin up,their skirt are too short,their socks can't be seen.

dear and me are all ryte ler bahs after quarrelling since sunday. hmms* this period of time,so sad so miserable. i miss him hella lot =)
tml got 2 hrs of practice =( *sadden. only 2 hrs..what's the use?. attending a concert tml!. yeahs..singapore wind symphony =) ...sir is performing..~

it's best to remain as urself. what's the use of coping another person?. you will only get critisism after critizism..where is your trueself?. people will only hate you deeper and deeper..`

i'm not getting anywhere for saying all those thingy. sorryyy if i've hurt ur feelings but sorryyy agn cause' it's already a fact known to all.

lolss. todayy o6o9o4
i'm able to update agn =) hmms. holidays have started but we can't enjoy it cause' most of us would be revising for the exams and going back to school for extra lessons every now and then.

went for a concert on sat. lolss. sir was performing solo..then bel was shouting sir sir sir. we had so much fun that day..lolss..~ =) btw,sorry to make them wait for at the station =x after the concert,we went to have supper at the prata stall..reached home ard 11 plus. sunday was boreddd.`- i was crapping during physics tuition,learnt quite a number of things. hsin was latee!. lolss. don't know what's up between them but hope they are all ryte yea?! completed my physics hwk with quite alot of blanks =) currently doing my chinese newspaper cuttings,i'm makin' my living' room filled with newspapers lying ard =) kor is slpin' on the sofa..-piggyx- i'm getting my new line somewhere in this week. kinda *sadden. as i've said,i'm not her rubbish bin!~. =( anyway,hsin guessed it correctly. -bleahs- i don't want anyone to guess my feelings..~ *sadden.

dear is now at mac doing his hwk with his friends. -haish- i'm boreddd. actually planned to go out with bel and hsin de,going to check the quotation of the files but now bel can't go so left me and hsin. =) hehes. but i'm gonna miss my favourite show,stairway to heaven =( nbm,there's a repeat at 12. there's remedial tml,then band. hmms,dearie is not gonna have training so can't see him lerss. i miss him lyke hell~.

2004-09-01T17:52:00.000+08:00

hmms. finally able to blog lers,blogspot is havin' problems currently.
jess and hsin are unable to blog their entries. especially hsin* cause she and jun had a enjoyable and unforgettable day ytd =)

btw,i'm still angry and upset. -haish- i'm missing irwin badly!! he came to look for him just now but i couldn't get out of the house. jie is takin' her exam results and mommie wanted me to keep an eye on her in case she cries badly or what. -haish- then i just see him cycling a bicycle round the estate. hmms,she failed 3 subjects out of 5?. wonder what will be daddie's reaction like?

-geex- forgotten to bring my emaths textbook home ytd,and i'm having my test tml =x lolss.
just finished my physics hwk,tried studying but i couldn't get anything into my head. oh yah,still wondering what happened to mdm yeo*

-haish- exams are approaching soon. i'm havin' orals nxt friday..gawd,i'm gonna be sooo damn dead..~ =( i hate oralss...!!

2004-08-31T20:15:00.000+08:00

hmms. today is eugene's bday..hsin today extremely happie sia..~lolss. i will kill that person* if she tries to break them up.

kekes. the day suxs~ -haish- had aces day in the mornin',where we walked ard the estate..and something happened. -geex- the horlicks drink suxs..it's so damn digusting...~ -blehx- went back to class,then some of us pon ss test. cause' we no tym learn..so we pass up blank paper =) lolss. then had lessons,somehow argued with jeff in the class today. i got kinda pissed off* then i ran out of the class. -haish- i avoided irwin agn today. i don't know what am i tryin to do. i'm so confused...~

the teachers' day concert suxs. it's kinda boring and i fell aslp~ bel got so damn angry when she saw that guy whacking the drum set..and that particular drum set isn't meant for whacking!. it will spoil it..but when they spoil it,they deny it. wth lorhs. president dua arhs...~ the drum set is signed under the band's name nors. not totally ours but it's under our name and we are responsible for it. we're not being selfish or what so ever,but you have indeed spoil the drum set by whacking it..~ not hitting it gently..~ idiott...then bel [-_-'l] shouted to them..that that's band property arhs?. something lidat..then i somehw scolded her =x -haish- ms ming cried in front of us today,i was shocked man cause' i was slping and i din know what actually happened. -geex- she held us back till 2 lidat...

after school,changed into my petee..then walked down to the foyer. saw kodi* and she say what my skirt too short larhs. then scold me...*idiot..always lidat de nors. -haish- hope she isn't taking our class for oral exam or i'm prepared to fail. btw,me and yixian took a cab back to rosyth. walked ard my primary school then cannot find them. so went to the canteen to find them nors. then luckily they are at canteen or else me and yixian go home liaos. we went to look for may soh* hehes,she become more auntie lers =x lolss. caught up with her for quite some time then she left cause' she need to prepare for a dinner. hehes..maybe going with her to the beach this sunday =) yeahs. hmms,left ard 3plus with jiaying. saw rongna and hazel at the busstop. lolss. went home,online till ard 6plus. went to take a nap..woke up,saw budd de msgs. -haish- sadden agn and agn..

i'm may seem heartless. but deep inside,do you know i'm also missing you badly?!. whenever i see you,i will feel sad and angry cause' i know the words you always say to me..used to make me feel high up in the sky but now they are just words without anymore meanings..`i trusted you agn,gave us both the second chance to be together agn. but just one day before we patch,you said those things to another girl. may i know what are you thinking of?.

happy bday,Jun. glad to hear that both you and hsin are happy now =) keep that smile going..hsin,don't be sadden by her* -gees-
tml's felix bday. have to wait till 12 agn. tired siax...

2004-08-30T19:54:00.000+08:00

haish. i'm feelin' so down now..
i don't know what am i actually feeling..

we quarrelled ytd over some things..wo de xin hao tong hao suan..~ i miss him so much,but i just couldn't forget. i slept ard 12plus last night cause' i couldn't slp at all..i was crying..~ i'm so fragile nowadayss..i msged bel,then she consoled me all those but made me cry even more. haish. jeff also made me cry in school..[the third time] idiottt..haish..he first scolded me heartless [-_-'l] then later chat liaos,he scolded me stupid. but what can i do now?..i feel really stupidfied..

mr wan so kpo..~ kekess..today during recess i showed jeff a letter then he said he wanna read,i asked why he say he wanna show care and concern for his studentss [-_-'l] wth..then me and jeff just walk away,together with bel there blur blur one. during assembly,got this performance. so funny..that guy is so *gayish. lolss. then bel keep saying like someone sia..~ after school,i tried "avoiding" him..the more i see him,the more i sad and angry...`sad case?. chatted with jeffrey till abt 2plus...till irwin they all come out from their remedial. he agn scolded me and all those..but he still managed to cheer me up. then bel they all so damn angry abt the drum set thingy..`during band,was so bored. taught mingshan the same things agn..then also taught the other recruits to do so. [-_-'l] after band,went home with bel. then saw zhengxin and another recruit.

on the way home,was missing him so badly..-haish- saw mommie then chatted with her..~ she so happy abt my test results. then she kissed me all over my face...=)

haish..i'm feeling so miserable now..~

2004-08-29T10:37:00.000+08:00

my com is back. everything's gone but with a new layout..

i just woke up and had my breakfast..currently laming with carolyn's sister..=)
went out with joanne they all ytd. only me+wanling+hsin+joanne...~ supposely to be a big grp now left us..`we went to heeren to buy sotong's present then went to cine to have lunch cause' we're so damn hungry..=) lolss. we walked from heeren to wisma there. bought famous amos cookies,ate some then joanne left us for the z-pop concert. left me+hsin+ling so we went to taka and walk ard nors. saw so many cute cute de thingy siax..lolss..we went to mrt to slack ard 6plus bahs,then acc hsin to eat her dinner at central there. on the way there,got this auntie walking in front of us..then i was like singing this lame song till she turn back and give us a stare. lolss..~ went to meet mommie at shoe shop ard 8 lidat...bought my school shoes and sandals =) reached home then i had dinner and tuition with mommie..~ hehes..then called mommy,had a conference with her and ting. we chatted for 2hr plus lehs. lolss..so funny =p mommy met with an car accident,i was totally freaked out when she msg me. aiyohhss,but she only suffered some injuries..~ heng... waited for irwin's de msg till abt 12plus bahs,till i really bth then i go slp lers..this morning woke up then saw his msg..just after i fall aslp..~

later need to go my uncle's house to baibai. hmmss...then i have to postpone my physics tuition till thursday..`=( -haish- i'm feeding on vinegar now..~ i'll stop here...`

2004-08-27T18:34:00.000+08:00

waitin for me to update my entry? =) lolss..

let's get straight to the point bahs.
let me think what i've done on wednesday..
had geo remedial that day..*it sucks. mdm lim was late cause' she was taking her photos. previously,after school..helped to move all the things back to the music store..then we were rushing here and there. after everything,i went back to class. went down to canteen and saw mdm lim there..mr wan they all take fun shots,so damn funny. they only know only to put a twist sign only..!. lolss. after remedial,went to band store. then went for sectional..so i taught mingshan how to play a flute. -haish- i keep repeating the same thing every single practice. i don't know what to do with her. then practise till half way,we were like drenched cause' of the sudden storm. went back to band room,then dry our instruments..went down to canteen. chatted with mommy for a while then her papa come lers. went home alone,cause' bel ps me nors. idiott!. lolss.

on thursday..
had emaths test and chem test. erms,i lost 3 marks for emaths test cause' i don't have the time to complete it. so hmms...chem test lehs,so damn difficult..~ gawd. got back my physics papaer. yeahs. i passed it =) geess...got a b3...lolss..then 3e kena spotcheck,then all of us panicked. lolss. stayed back in school for a band committee meeting. we got so excited abt havin' a band camp..lolss..~ went mac with mommy..then chatted for a while then got someone ask her mommy's number leh!!! lolss..wah,my mommy still got charm =) hehess. then we got no privacy when her npcc friends came along. [-_-'l] walked to int. then waited for her mother to come nors. lolss. then later i went off myself =)

today.
had chinese test. gawd damn it,-haish- the paper was like ---------. shittyyy man. i was like rushing my way thru,mr ng helped me with some questions. then i keep helping joanne with the words. lolss. after that was chemistry,did practical agn. the ammonia gas can kill pple sia..it stinks* then we were supposed to test for the presence of cations. my hands were so soapy cause' of the alkalis. was slackin' my way thru during chem and maths. after school,stayed in class to acc yixian. he like alone in the class..so zibi..~ jeff came back then we play catching [-_-'l] lolss. during chinese remedial,kangquan wrote my name on the middlefinger of the drug abuse card..then i wrote his name there also..~ lolss..after went back to band store to sort out the scores. so damn messy...still have to bring some home sia..tml still got band. dunno whether wan to go out with joanne they all anot. hmmss....

26o8. me and irwin patch back lers. finally..dearie and dardar back together..~ gonna hold on to him tight,nv wanna let go anymore..

2004-08-24T19:43:00.000+08:00

i'm irritated by the guy agn. *grrh* =(

had pizza on sunday =) hehess..cause' me and kor lazy to go out and buy so we ordered and waited for it. we ate 1 and a half pizza together. lolss.

monday. irwin's birthday!. hehes..made a card for him,then passed it on to hsin they all to sign. asked jeff to help me pass it to him cause' hsin they all don't want to. then i still have to bribe him~. spent the day in school reading my storybook =). the book is so damn touching..missed my emaths period and phyiscs period cause' i engrossed in my book. geex. after school,had band practice and irwin have softball training. band practice is such a bore!. i dozed off..=x and nobody actually knew it cause' i was sitting at the corner..and sir was like concentrating on the brass section so i'm lucky =) lolss. spent most of the hrs building up our basic foundation. after band,waited for irwin. then we walked out of school together..bel was with us then she was so embarassed. lolss. not my fault..but -shhs- so she walked behind us. i wanted to send irwin home but he didn't want. so in the end,as usual he sent me home. on the bus,he helped me carry my flute and i help him carry his present..then i placed a letter in the bag. hehes. jeff they all hinted him something during recess,and he got the wrong message. stupid jeffrey..`i waited till 12 lidat agn,then msg him. hehes,actually i wanted to acc him till the very last minute of his birthday but he went to slp first [-_-'l] hehes..

life is bore nowadays. so many tests are coming up and i'm going mad cause' i wasn't paying attention in class at all =x so i'm havin a hard time catching up..geess -eyes rollin'- had physics test today...hsin helped me with one question..i was actually on the right track but i got confused agn. lolss. then i screwed it up agn. so i think i'm falling this test agn. took back my maths test,i failed by half a mark!!!!. shittty. i failed my ss test badly too..but i passed my geography test by half a mark!. my gawd..why are my results going haywire..~? steph today a bit mood swing bahss. scare the wits out of me,i was like don't dare to talk to her cause' she havin' this black face. [-_-'l] then during maths,she keep playing with me. lolss. went home with her..then saw timonthy. idiotic fellow..and he kept irritating us..lolss. went home,had a nice lunch and slp =) hehes..woke up and i started memorising my chinese. -haish-

mandl. my brother. sorry if i have actually made you angrryyy or neglected you. i'm really busy these few days. geez. you and budd are now addicted to comics?!. hmms,i didn't block you in msn. loss of words now...just hope you will take care of yourself..~ once ur anger is gone,talk to me..i will fill you in with lotsa things..~ i'm waitin' for a listening ear from a brother..=)

2004-08-22T17:38:00.000+08:00

=) let's see what's up..

geex. nodody's at home now except for me and kor. daddie gave us $20 for dinner and off he go. -shakes head- so i've got to get my dinner on my own later. so sad..

irwin's out with his buddies for a movie. tml is his birthday!. =)))

hmms. went to bishan today to baibai my great grandmother. so fast nia,it's gonna be her third yr anniversary on 15o904,the day where she left us for the netherworld. went home after that,slept for a while..woke up and i slacked agn =) till ard 2plus..waited for hsin they all. then later i came online,and i asked her then she say got no tuition. geez..make me wait for nothing...

came online. did nth..lent my ear to someone to say out his surrows..-haish- i'm bored.!!! *arghs*

poof* bye..

2004-08-21T21:19:00.000+08:00

eh heyss..
currently havin' mood swings...wth`. >.<.

let's see what i've done today..
ermx. had band practice in the morning..played this new song called where eagles soar`we've been waiting for this song for long..and we started playing it..it's kinda difficult but i'm sure we'll practice hard to make it perfect. =) wind section had this bar of running notes..so damn difficult..~ [-_-'l] melody is fine..sir so biased* keep sayin' me this and that -arghs- then praise mingshan!. lolss. after band,go photocopy score cause' i forgotten to photocopy the timpani score..then somemore sir wants it back by today mars..so bo pian.~ went home with bel,but she went back to school cause' she forgotten to take money from her friend. so i walked to the busstop myself,took a bus then stopped at bball court..saw steph,lolss...then she run to me tellin' me her "unlucky" stuff. lolss. went home,changed and i went out.

saw hsin at the bus stop so we walked into the mrt station..waited for bel for a good long 40 mins. first time waitin' for a person for so long and i hate waiting for pple!...saw papa* while waiting,then exchanged phone numbers..`he got a new mama agn. [-_-'l] then me+bel+hsin heeded to town [heeren/cine]..saw yingqi at the traffic light. that tiny girl* didn't turn up for band practice today cause' she has slight fever but now she's towning under the sun. went to cine,bought weilin's+jess present there..walked to heeren..bought jessica's pressie =) a nice one. lolss. then later walked to far east and bought irwin's pressie. my leg is breakin' by then. i still had to take a train back to somerset to meet papa and his friends. meet liao,then we left cause' papa want to watch movie,somemore is ghost story i don't like so i didn't follow them. took a train..slacked in there,sat in the train for two rounds with hsin. bel went off first. was fallin' aslp in the train,but then got this grp of teenagers walked into the train then my peace was gone. then this girl also fell and she shouted damn loud. i almost burst out laughing and i had a hard time controlling. so me and hsin were like trying to sound like we were laughing at another auntie at the train in the afternoon where she was so kiasu,that we haven reach someerset yet..she started saying "excuse me,i'm gettin' out the train" ..lolss..and she stepped on my foot. hsin almost shouted back saying"we''re gettin' off too". lolss..reached home ard 8plus. then had dinner together with daddie and kor. havin' crabs agn. *blah*

feelin' so bloated now.

oh yah,mommie took away my sim card. pathetic me..cause my bill was high..daddie wanted to change my line..`-haish- currently using a hi card. so sad..

i've got a huge family =) lolss.
lettme list them out..

ah gong - da felix.

mommy - yun
daddy1 - deex
daddy2 - =xxx
daddy3 - =xxx
daddy4 - shuwen [back tire] lolss

godmei - bel [mommy adopt her de] *blah*

papa - richie
mama - dunno =)

daddie - my real dad
mommie - my real mom

kor - my one and only precious kor [jordon]

lastly..not forgetting my loved ones...

irwin =x - the man of my dreamss

steph - my first ever gf..

emma - another gf of minee...

jeff - my mei cum brother..lolss..

rui - my buddy..

ting - my sister for life..

jasss - sister for life too =) thru we aren't close..

last but not least.. mandl - my brother!.

the loved ones in my life. =) hmm yeahs..all of them do hold a place in my heart..your names are engraved deep in my heart so better engraved mine in urs too. takkaire.. =p miss ya all..

at last,my mood is gettin' better..

2004-08-19T20:38:00.000+08:00

my day is bad..*real bad. -haish- i'm havin' my period. mood going this way -------- [monotonous]

mornin' was all ryte. did some chemical mixing..all those kind of things,actually looked forward to this experiment cause' we rarely get to do experiments. but today,i feel it's nth..kinda disappointing..after chemistry,was physics. mr wan,he's gettin' fedup with our class..lolss..every teacher does..~ btw,he don't know how to control us. mrs er is gettin' crazier each day..she comes into the class everyday shouting. and we will get shock by her sudden wave of dramatic actions. [-_-'l] had chinese spelling today,i've forgotten abt it. =( then i learn it during recess..-haish-..my maths is gettin' from bad to worst. had my emaths test today,stared at the three questions blanky..practically scribling on my graph paper..=(

after school,went to look for bel then mr tan dun let her class out. then i went to look for nick for my tamagotchi [erzi]..he said he left it in his class,he dun wan..i got soo upsett till i cried when he said erzi wasn't in the class when he went back to class. was crying terribly,then wenzheng came and console me. a nice freako. lolss. then mrs er asked me to bring coffee up to third level,i did and i saw kor in the room. but i din go in cause' he will ask why i'm cryin'. went back downstairs..saw nick,then he promised to bring back my erzi to me later when he go look for that someone*who took my erzi without my permission. went town with mommy,shopped for daddy2 de present. then i choose this wallet..and she bought it together with another hp pouch and daddy2 de present is so exxx. gawd!. took a train back to serangoon mrt station..stayed there for a while,waited for mommy to call her mother to ask whether she cld stay out late cause' she wanted to meet daddy2..but she cldn't =( so we walked back to s'goon int. saw nick and there he was,acting as my erzi. -haish- he acc me home,where his actings still go on. but he kept on pinching me on my cheek..in the end,my erzi wasn't back with me. it's still with that idiotic person. =(

reached home. saw irwin online..-haish- he seems bored and tired,i dunno how to cheer him up where myself is also so sad. i've somehw regretted my decision...what is the purpose of wallowing in pity for the past month?. -haish- time passes so fast,term 3 is ending soon. life has been hard for me for the past 8months,going through the sweet+sour+hot+bitter tastes of life..~ i miss him. truly from the bottom of my heart. i longed to call him dearie once agn in my lifetime...

2004-08-17T19:52:00.000+08:00

hmm. didn't update for three days =)

went for fireworks on sunday,together with bel+hsin+jennifer+jeff+irwin+jun. met up ard 7 lidat,was feeling so unwell that evening. still asked jun to help me bring medicine down,then he keep asking me to pay for the mineral water. i paid him then he returned it back to me [-_-'l] took a train down to esplanade,then it was so damn freaking crowded. i was sweating like hell,squeeze together with alot of pple. in the end,we watched the fireworks beside the road there. some trees blocked some of it,but managed to see quite alot. it's so nice,hehe..got heart shape one agn..=p it lasted for abt 10mins bahx,it's worth it larh. nxt yr must go agn..then go there early =) hehes. after that,the whole lot of us were like walking ard..then me and hsin de mood kena dampen by something. wth. on the way home,was so weak and upset. havin' gastric pain cause' i didn't eat much for dinner. haish,reached home..slacked for a while then i went to bed.

monday. sir bluffed us..say what he will bring new score but he didn't. then he promised agn to bring on sat and he better keep his promise. lolss. it's understandable that he's suffering from "lao ren chi dai zheng". lolss. he somehw managed to "threaten" my recruit. then she was frighten cause' she wanted to play the flute not percussion. and i was given the "task" to spy on her and teach her too. i rather die than do that..-haish- oh yeah,sir say my playing is almost the same as choonwei =) lolss. yeahs!. did my sound really improve? i don't sense it bahss..but sir said it improved alot =p played recess rock then played melody together with mingxiang agn. my gawd!. bel still say what must pei yang gan qing with him. bullshit..i will laugh when i see him...so what abt playing a solo together with him!. -vomits- he still own me his punishment!. =) band was quite all right la,i've been laughing non-stop. yingqi is taking my steps..going crazy too. ms chan rushed us to keep the instruments and she was there boasting that we cld actually keep in such a short period of time. in fact,many of us didn't wash the mouthpiece..didn't clean the instrument properly including me,i didn't even have the time to clean and wash. lolss. sir asked me over and he gave me quite a number of instructions. lolss. wth. after band,went home for maths tuition. till abt 9.30 then had chinese tuition with mommie till 10.30. completed my hwk abt 12 lidat.

this mornin' woke up ard 6,took a bathe. was sneezing the entire morning..used up two packets of tissue =) feel as if i'm gonna die..lolss..~ so restless..mr tan hn didn't come today then mr wan took over..and we have 5 periods together with him today. wtf. see him till very sianx. helped budd to keep his hp cause' he told me he maybe kena spotcheck or what so i help him keep. then in class,i very scared cause' got so many councillors sittin' round me. later hp drop out how?. lolss. des said he saw bong usin it in class =x aiyohss. after school,went to find rui. heard from yeeping that he and mr fong quarrelled till very jialatz. then i ps bel =x cause' daddie came and fetch me to do my ic. hehes..went down to the ica building,the queue was short. that lady took my thumbprints agn and agn`then need to sign this and that. so troublesome. after do finish ler,had lunch at bugis..agn fishball noodles. lolss. then daddie asked me whether is it i like it so much. dunno why i suddenly got cravings for fishball noodles these few days. =) after that,went home..slept for 1hr plus. today in school,buai tahan..really very slpy. lolss.

tml need to stay back for band agn. cause' of got percussion practice then i need to help them photocopy score...then also got english compre test..=( sobxx. so tired. later havin' chinese tuition with mommie agn.

2004-08-15T00:07:00.000+08:00

i'mmmm gonna be sooo dead. lolss.

my ic isn't done yet by now. i've totally got it out of my mind for the past week and now the "deadline" has past. got mommie to call the office on monday,wonder what punishment will they have for me. -eyes rollin'-

today,got up a lil late cause' i'm too angry to slp last night. then i spent my night,listening to rock music =) she spoke to me alot today..*arghs* had band practice in the morning,pulled myself out of my dreams. so sad..daddie was still slping when i woke up so i didn't bother to wake him up. went to school on my own,reached there..read jolene's report and crap alot with bel. whole day suxs..totally a bore!. spent the whole freaking mornin' teaching my recruit..changed her amberture[is it spelled this way?] repeated the same old things for almost 1hr plus. got gastric pains so me+bel+jess went down to the canteen to get some food =) the last hr was combine practice,sir was also very slpy by then. i went downstairs to sir's car and get the cds..then kelvin waved to me,i was like "who the hell is he?." lolss. thought for quite some time then i realised..he had changed sooo much!. [-_-'l] sir let us listened to some music,and that piece oh my gawd..is nice but difficult to play. he's gettin' it for us on monday...-geez- gettin' excited cause' got flute solo. i'm scared that i will screw it up =x

-haish- i'm thinkin' of switching my recruit to percussion. what to do?. she can't play after months of coaching..i do get frustrated easily,whatever i teaches her..she don't get it into her head!.

back to me,after band..went mac with bel+hsin+ling. ling treated me ice-cream or is it bel?. shared my mp3 player with bel,then she's so fussy..want to listen to this and that..! qianbei walked into mac,then bel panicked but before that,she was like moving along with music and her hp in her hands moving too. what a sotong. went home ard 1plus,then irwin msged me..asking me to did i went to mac just now. hehes,he ran back to mac to look for me when jeerui told him. btw,he also forgotten what he asked on last week?. waited for him outside school for a while but i left after msging him.

had lunch at home,burned my cds and then i started off with my hwk. in the end,i fell aslp =x all the way till 6plus. mommie woke me up and asked me to change my clothes. went to hougang plaza for dinner,felt sympathetic towards him..he lost his balance on this plate of dishes and he had to clear up the mess himself. -haish- i see lers,really xin suan. ='(

kor borrowed quite a number of vcds from steph. lolss. he called her himself..=) hehes..gonna continue reading my book now..`dunno whether i shld go for the fireworks..-haish-

2004-08-14T00:00:00.000+08:00

i'm so damn pissed off* now..by my idiotic sis!. i'm gonna hate her for life!. -haish-
i've tried accepting her..from the past till now,but now i'm not gonna give a fucking damn to her*.. a sister may get to share clothes or whatever benefits but what i hate most abt her*..she's always bai jia zi~ damn it. i hate it when we always had to mention that i'm the elder sis so listen to me. what the hell is this..she may be elder but her thinking is like a thirteen yr old kid. so what if i showed her attitude,that's me. i have my moods..i'm a human..did i ever shout back at her when she showed me attitude. daddie told me to give her respect,yesh i did but did she ever showed me any respect. no..she didn't. wtf. i hate having this sister..

what a day i've been through..boreness.sense of dying.crazy.happy.crying~ first had boreness,dragged myself out of bed in the morning..reached school when the bell was abt to ring. first two periods are chinese,copied biji from daphne. then after that was chemistry? two periods of it..in the lab,i was like so slpy..dozing off..and i missed out quite alot. followed by english period,oral practice agn. during recess,had a chat with steph outside science lab..chatted abt hp stuff and i can still say abt her* damn it. after recess i was like dying..dunno how did i managed to survive through the three periods. school ended,mood got better. attended chinese remedial and also the chinese story telling thingy. that thing is so lame!. it's like the teacher is reciting to us huai zhu ge ge,we were like bored to hell. she even told some of the details wrong and we had to correct her. -haish- went home with steph.

changed my clothes and went out with my gf =) went to hougang mall to borrow books and then went to have our dinner at the foodcourt. after dinner,supposed to go towning and on the way to the mrt station,there's this woman blocking our way for a few seconds and steph gave her those kind of looks. then just nice,another woman banged into her so her face went this way [-_-'l] so hildarious. lols..laughed my head off man. we stayed in this accessories shop for quite some time,we were choosing rings,hairbands and some other things. lolss. then later bought wrapping paper. we went to hmv,i wanted to listen to JJ's new cd but there isn't. wtf. walked up and down hmv listening to other musics. and both of us were making a fool out of ourselves by talking damn loud. lolss. left town ard 8plus..on the way home,walking to the bus stop..i was singing linyichen's song then steph keep making remarks [-_-'l] lolss. then later on 147,was laughing my head off when steph did some stupid actions and when i was laughing,i was actually amused by someone who is sleeping and her hair is covering her face. lolss. i really laugh till my tears drop..gawd..~ lolss. laughed all the way home..reached home and had this fucking quarrel with my idiotic sister*.

rushing for my band report. haven't got it printed. i'm gonna be so dead..!

2004-08-11T15:07:00.000+08:00

Mostly everyone's bloggie is mentioning abt Mr Maxx. kor told me ytd morning,i didn't believe him at the start. gawd..haish..everything happens so fast,in just a blink of eye. heard that they had a mintue of silence just like to mourn for him. my whole class were at the stadium and mr ng made us do so during his chinese lesson.

this mornin' 2.4km run. hell manx..shldn't have taken anything in the morning,after 2.4..i almost fainted man. felt so nauseous+dizzy+weak. walked a lil,then i will squat down cause' i'm unable to see clearly. sadden. took mr wan's car back to school together with rujia. kangquan helped me carry my bag to school =) lolss. go back to class,i was like so xinku. mr tan still made us copy the whole paper of corrections. haish. my amaths is a gone case!. lolss. by maybe after pe,i'm feeling much better lers.

got back my chem test. *arghs* got a b3. so sad...jeff and steph all got distinction nors. my english is also gone case subject,i don't know how to improve or what larh. it's seems to deprove everytime i pay attention to it. lolss. after school,went home with steph and we were like joking ard. walked with wenzheng to the busstop then saw yongkiat on the bus. lolss.

did i mention i saw JJ on ndp. lolss. my gawd?!. he sang tiantang for us after the parade...so cute!. =)))) lolss. nxt yr dunno who will be singing?. yeahs..have to wrap my books lers..

2004-08-10T10:08:00.000+08:00

ndp rawks!. lolss.

so damn pissed off by my com..*arghs* it's infected with virus and now i can't even go into my mailbox. wth. whatever i press,it will bring me to a ~~porn site'~~. idiottt..

hmms. went off to meet steph at abt 11.30 lidat,waited for my brother under steph's blk..cause' he's following us to town to buy some things. geex. we fooled ard alot on the train~ kor and us went separate ways after reaching somerset =( lolss. then an aunite banged into steph,and her arm was "stained" by her sweat. it's so damn digusting..idiott steph still wipe some on me..what a friend manx..~ rushed into heerens to wash the sweat off. walked ard heerens,took some pictures [it's nice!]. wandered ard till abt 1plus?. walked to cine and had lunch there. pei steph eat,then later something embarassing happened. my gawd!. saw a couple quarrelling,really quarrelling in the sense that the girl kicks the boy and what so ever. lolss. we actually planned to slack at long john's but then we rushed off. while walking to far east,atmosphere is there. national songs are playing and so on. reached far east,walked ard the first level of the mall. slacked at one corner,where i keep takin' pics of myself. =x lolss. so damn funny siax. we headed to take train to kallang since we have nth to do at town there. reached kallang ard 3.30 lidat bah,went to the toilet at mac. dunno what's wrong with everybody..or rather the girls? suddenly need urgent use and the toilet queue is like so damn freaking long..the waiter and waitress at mac there even allowed girls to use the men's toilet. lolss. i die die also don't want to go in there.

me and steph went into the same toilet..changed then we waited at the corridor for shauna. then she arrived at 4.30 lidat,walked to the stadium with wenjun+leon+stanly+rodney+leon's friend+shauna+her sister. then somehow me and steph got lost from them..the crowd was already there,we were like squeezing and being pushed to walk. reached the stadium exactly 5.30 lidat. crammed there like hell. a uncle sat beside me,like so lifeless lidat [-_-'l] lolss. got kinda pissed off by steph cause' she keeping mentioning syf de thingy..warned her not to say but she keep saying. wtf. oh yah,we tried putting on the tatoo but we failed =x hehess..saw tkss band. my gawd!!!. woahs..it's so nice..my favourite band..~ then steph larh,keep interrupting..thinkin' that the whole stadium belongs to her..talked on phone so loud..~ all sorts of performance followed,saw mommy's performance. hehes..she keep jumping here and there...i can't find her..`got high ard 7lidat bahs,when the exact performance happened. then we were like going crazy doing all kind of things. sang national songs and the fireworks is so damn damn damn nice. it's so big..it was behind us,we turned ard..and the sight was so awesome. woahs..the feeling is so great. lolss. hmms,the whole thing ended with the tribute to Mr Goh. steph agn,talked very loud on her hp. [-_-'l] we waited for almost everyone to leave. we stand on the benches,going crazy..lolss..~ there were some others going crazy too,almost all our age lidat. left the stadium ard 9 lidat.

asked jeff out for supper,then he don't want. phangsei me!. haish..went to prata stall there,had two pratas each..then we walked home. reached home,so tired. slacked till abt 12 lidat then go bathe. hehes,slept at 1am lidat. this mornin' woke up ard 9 lidat,last night dreamt abt so many things. haish.

so damn pissed by my com de virus!!!. *arghs*
but the parade is nice =) try making' a trip down there,u'll nv regret..lolss..

2004-08-09T09:50:00.000+08:00

heys..=)

my mood is better now. National Day..~ 39th yrs of independence. hehes,daddie and the whole family will be going to my grandmother's house to celebrate national day while i'm at the stadium with steph..enjoying the atmosphere there..*woahs. will be going with steph+shauna+leon?. oh yah,still can see JJ lehs. steph hates him opps*.

just completed my english tys..yixian is gettin' it from me later. hmms,i'm doing him a big favour..he's gonna own me one. i'll be lending him my tys and also my ss articles. such a blur monitor,losing this and that [-_-'l]
geez. i'm so slpy now. woke up ard 7 lidat to complete the June 2000 paper...forgotten to do it last night..cause' of the bloggie thingy. *arghs*

i'll be going out in maybe abt 1 and a half hour later =) to meet steph,going town with her then later meet shauna at kallang mrt station. don't know where we will be going later..`slack ard town,bitch ard?. perhaps gonna meet lotsa pple we know. lolss. long time time nv go out with her lers...=) so sad huh. holidays are ending soon..5 days of holidays..i'm just slacking..~ haven't do any revision or what so ever =x hwk still not completed yet. i'm only done with my band report+biji+english hwk. still got lotsa more...
[1] movie summary on i robot
[2] chinese newspaper cuttin'
[3] rewrappin' my chem book
[4] emaths hwk
[5] geo test corrections
[6] social studies articles
gonna rush them thru on tues. haish.
-+_`..i miss him. -+_`..

2004-08-09T00:35:00.000+08:00

a short message to all my beloved ones`...

irwin*
we seems to have run out of topics to chat. glad that both of us are still keeping in contact after so much things had happened. there's still an obstacle for us to go across. i've lost trust in you ever since that very day..hope you can win back the trust and don't misuse it agn. if we are meant to be together,we'll be able to overcome every obstacle and trouble that comes to us. =) iLu.

yun* mommy aka bestie
heyx. seems long that i've not been chatting with ya. i'll be seeing you tml @ ndp. hope things are going on fine in ur life. as for daddy2,better grab the chance kaes. it's time to let ur wound heal for once,since he's willing to help ya. all the best between you and him. hmms,mommy cannot baoqi nuer de kaes! oh yah,where's my letter?. orhss...

steph*
moi first gf ever. hmms,really really glad and happy to sort things out with ya =) sorry for giving ya such a feelin'. hehes,i'll nv forget what you've done for me..i'll rmb it by heart. hmms,thanks for cheering me up every now and then. erms,also.."thanks" for shutting me up yeah?!. lolss. catchin' the parade with me..that's good hor?. hmms,can't wait to enjoy the atmosphere there. hehes..takkaire..~

emma*
how's are you nowadays? we've not been contacting much these days. sorry for not sending a mail..cause' i'm rather busy these days. hmms,not sure whether you get to read this but if u happen to read this,drop me a mail with ur happenings. =) saw ur blog,don't get too stressed up by ur band stuff. take it easy..i'm always supporting ya.

jeff*
my sister cum brother. lolss. thanks for lending me ur shoulders. =) a petty guy by nature..*hopes he change that. if you're angry with me or what,can you let me know at first? cause' i didn't know you're angry with me on sat till i msg you. hahas. btw,think before u act. whatever you do,i'll be there supporting you..so don't worry and be firm of ur decision. don't be so fickle-minded abt it. hmms,don't worry..i wun ps you or forget you de..you better not forget me or ps me also hor?!.

ting*
heys..so many things have happened. misunderstandings here and then..~ i also don't know how to explain or what. but i'm rather unhappy that you've been keeping so much things from me. haish. what are sisters for? backstabbing or what?. whatever it is,you'll be my sister forever..~

mandl*
hey guy. really drifted apart from ya alot. you've been pissing me off with band stuff yea?. hehes. but i swear that i've not been taking it to heart. so don't worry..~ sorry for not being there with ya when u needed me. haish. feel rather sad that u actually lost the st gab concert's ticket. haish..~ but the concert isn't that nice,so it's ok if u missed it =) hmms,got anything..just give me a call..~

budd*
well..i'm really sorry..so like not talking to ya for days..~ i'm not angry anymore..`sorry abt it. cause' i'm feeling down on that very day. and i don't like you keeping things to yourself and becoming zibi agn. i hate that. feel free to come to me when you need a listening ear. i'm always here. i know alot of things happened to you..but you've chose not to tell me. it's all right..as long as you're gettin' help from others..don't slack so much liao larh,o level comin' lers..don't go out every single day. same sentence,you fu tong xiang..you nan tong dang..~

2004-08-08T23:46:00.000+08:00

haish. i'm having mood swings now..

supposed to go out with hsin ytd,but my body ached for the whole day and i ended up postponing it. rested at home for the whole day,slacked ard in the house. was so damn pissed off by chouhong ytd,freaking idiot. he made me so damn pissed off by his lamest joke. i ignored him and he pestered me by calling my hp every now and then. msging me msgs asking me to forgive him or what so ever. wth. i had no peace at all ytd. headache aches more than ever. nabeix..make me feel so sick..~ how lame can a person be?!. had national day dinner outside my school. serangoon garden band was there and they played canon in d. my gawd!. lolss. sir still say dun have that score de arrangement!!!. bluff me..my tears almost flowed down my cheeks when i heard that song. hmms..dinner wasn't that nice..jeff+irwin+boon+jun came to look for me,to pass me my cotton candy =) hehes,i didn't know abt the thingy on cotton candy till hsin told me. i asked jeff to help me buy then he call irwin to help me buy then he bought the blue one cause' i like blue colour?. hehes...went home ard 10plus lidat,met jeff @ blk 129 to pass him my amaths text. chatted for quite a while till abt 12 lidat,then we went home.

watched winter sonata with kor last night,till abt 2. daddie was so angry that jie didn't come home as promised at 1. she came back at 4plus. opps* woke up ard 10plus this morning,had my breakfast and watched tv. arranged my biji..copied everything out..~ so damn tiring. hsin came abt 2.15 lidat,just after mdm yeo msg me that she cldn't make it for our tuition. then hsin was like,"aiyah..just go in nors". lolss. she helped me with my band report..i don't want to make it too formal..as in like a essay form. gawd,why do we have to write this report?. *argh* then we worked on the band camp and band tour de proposal. hmms,hehes..gettin' excited over it =) yeahs. again,we planned to watch fireworks. then like last minute,hardly anyone cld make it so we postponed it to nxt week. then so qiao,irwin just now asked me to watch fireworks with him nxt week..so yeah,we're gonna watch fireworks together with jeff+me+hsin+irwin..jun not confirm!!!. spent the whole night figuring out this stupid layout..but i still cldn't get it done. *arghs* have to stick with this artistic design first =)

haish. i somehow don't feel his heart lers. we've kind of drift apart ler bahs. haish..i dun wan..~ i don't know what's wrong with me these days. i feel so weird,so unhappy,so emotional. i seems to have drifted apart from so many pple. mommy,tingz*,budd,steph,emma..-haish- i seems alienated to them lers...banned from the outer world..~

2004-08-06T22:48:00.000+08:00

feel kinda uneasy now*-haish-

hmm,on thurs. had my napfa..passed all my 5 items~ luckily,i was counted as 14 yr 11 months =) lolss. results..
inclined pull ups - 14
shuttle run - 12.2 s
sit ups - 30
standing broad jump - 164cm
sit and reach -49cm
woa. i got a c for standing broad jump!. lucky manx. i was so scared that i wun get a c for it. after napfa,waited for bel to finish. then her wallet was taken away by mr raymond. wtf. he took her wallet in front of me nors. nabeix. waited for her till 5 lidat..went home,had a quick bathe. rushed out to meet her and choonwei. she's wearing high heels. oh my goodness! actually i can get into the train but she was like struggling with her high heel shoes at the escalator. i was like abt to enter the train when she shouted my name asking me not to enter..[-_-'l] then called choonwei and kelly,he waited for us at potong mrt station. then we took a train down to city hall to meet yeeping. had our "dinner" there,left the place @ 7 lidat. walked all the way into victoria concert hall..so tiring..~ attended st. gab symphonic band concert. their standard is there but the songs were boring..which caused me to doze off. the flute player..lolss,was handsome. anyway,the whole thingy ended abt 10plus with some interesting pieces which actually made me think that the concert wasn't that bad. went home together with my seniors and juniors. choonwei they all went another way,i felt bad for ps-ing them then i waited for them at dhoby ghaut. then we went home together. ziyang sat the same bus as me,then we were laughing abt someone. lolss. reached home,had supper and then i went to bed =)
this morning,met mcb under my blk. went to school together,i was like a living zombie. so tired and slpy..reached school,went up to band room and set up all the instruments and everything larhs. today so lame,the parade commander wasn't attentive enough,the contigents are not prepared yet..then he shouted the command and we started playing the music. cut off ccause' no one was marching in. then mr paul made an excuse saying that the school are to be sitted before the contigents march in. *so lame* the parade was all right,then later school was dismissed into the hall. we took photos =) lolss..this yr dun have yr book but a cd rom. woahs. had a handling-over ceremony,whereby huimei hand over her bm post to bel..and dan hand over his dm post to jolene. the whole ceremony was so funny..cracked many jokes..~ went down to canteen to watch the concert. heard that the concert suxs..i only caught the community singing..~ we were singing in the canteen,then saw so many pple tearing. haish. my gawd. after school,waited for jess they all. was sitting in the canteen,then irwin said bye to me. hehes..so cute..~ had lunch after reaching home,fell aslp then i went to meet jess they all. saw irwin they all at the interchange. then he followed me to mrt station,and he left. haish. met choonwei they all..they were having their lunch~ walked ard ps...then headed to far east..took pics and i left to meet mcb. lolss. so many weird thingy happened..reached home ard 6plus. had my dinner then went to hospital to visit my relative..so sianx..~

stop here. i'm tired.

2004-08-04T19:49:00.000+08:00

lolss. i'm gettin' back lotsa feedback for the previous entry. gawd`justin requested some vulgarities..[-_-'l]

hmms. today,had quite a bad start. studied my chemistry till 11plus last night,study till nth can go into my mind anymore~ slept like a pig,hugging my baobei mashimaro for the past few nights. woahs,the feeling is so great!. lolss. my bed is filled with bears,my sister keep asking me whether i got enough place to slp anot. ermx,school was all right. went to look for kodi this morning,then have to pin my hair like a nerd..wth. then she caught my skirt for being short?!. then luckily i tucked in my blouse..or else i'll have detention~ hae to suffer in school for whole day,looking like a idiotic nerd. slacked for the whole period during pe =) lolss. gossiped ard with jamie and jeff. lolss. a bunch of auntiess. guess it..it's on the same topic yeah! =D chemistry test was all right,i got 7/8 for mcq. *argh* then later i forgot quite a number of things. i'm always failing my english compo,how am i going to improve on it?. haish. ss test,open book test =) hehes..my essay was a lil. short =x shld be able to hit level 3 or 4 bahs.

after school,had lunch with kangquan and beautrice. then later stayed at the foyer there,kangquan taught me amaths. haish..freaking subject..~ watched the lower sec girls have their napfa..damn it,desmond kor and kangquan is gonna laugh at us tml!. haish. i'm gonna embarass myself agn..[used to it] des kor and kangquan accompained me at the foyer there,while waiting for hsin they all to come back. then chat alot,walked ard the school..~ wait till abt 4 plus reaching 5,then i just walked out of school with des..hoping to see them..~ saw them at the traffic light there..lolss..des kor is soo *good..letting his mei to carry three bags. went to mac with junhao+ling+hsin. was feeling kinda disgusted..my gawd,just survived thru by talking with hsin. guangyi arrived,then he passed me the present. chatted for a while then ling and junhao left,they said bye but i didn't reply. aren't i evil? haish. waited for jun..then we left nors. went home myself..thought of many many things during the way home..~

so many memories flowed back. the lift incident whereby i had to press the lift button before he dares to enter the life cause' he claims the lift doesn't like him. hehes. where's my trust? i love him with all my heart..i'm willing to give him back the trust i used to give him,but will he misuse it agn?. she used to have a crush on him..nobody told me till today`what the hell,i'm like being kept in the dark for how long?. i have the right to know it. at least we cld have a fair compeition..i don't want her to do things behind my back..i hate it..~ my heart hurts..felt like being backstabbed by her`. i hate that feeling..do i really have to give him up for her? i miss him badly,how much i wished i cld call him dearie agn. haish..perhaps in my dreams bahx..~

2004-08-03T17:00:00.000+08:00

heyx.

hehes. i'm still receiving presents =) all belated de. hmm..added them to my collections yeah?!. =)

hmmx,gonna skip tuition later. haish,felt so guilty abt it~ nBmx,just take the free time to catch up with my other subjects`. this entry is gonna be a cruel one.. hope no one takes offence. btw,i'm having a great great headache now. my gawd,just swallowed two pills of panadol just now..if it doesn't get any better,i've to take more =(

went for band ytd. quite boring..i'm always dozing off there due to sir's sayings and lecture. lols. played this japanese song that sir liked. all the seniors came back,some complained..some didn't even want to come at all..~ gawd manx..! if they didn't like band,why did they join in the first place?. haish. after band,went home. had my dinner and off i came online..chatting with my kor,nick and some others. still kinda troubled abt irwin's thingy.

this morning,woke up late..ard 6.45pm. gawd damn it,i was rushing in and out of my room. the weather is cold these two days...~ argh* gonna have pe for three times this week,cause of the change of time-table. wtf man. having NAPFA on thurs. die..i'm also attending st-gab concert at victoria concert hall...hope i cld actually make it on time bahx. i'm having a phobia for amaths now..haish..~ was caught by kodi for not clipping up my hair properly.. and we have to buy pins to pin it up for her tml morning. sux it!. i had gone blank when i'm having the test. i don't even know how to do a single question at all!. gawd damn it..i was like scibbling on my foolscap,didn't know what i'm working on and my brain shut down. haish. asked kangquan and he told me to do step by step. he previously taught me during recess and cme period..cause' i dun understand the topic at all. i managed to complete one pathetic question and left 2 questions completely undone. wtf man,tanhn said he will be testing us on proving identities and on relations function till range of functions. but the test he set was on the previous chapter,nth came out on identities. idiott..~ i wasn't in the mood to do the paper when my notebook had gone missin'. wth,that notebook of mine contain lots of my secrets. and i was told that sophina and matthias had took it to read. harlow! do you know you are invading my privacy?! dun you know how to ask for permission?. haish. after school,waited for joanne. left without her after searching her for so long,then later i saw her outside with friends. wtf man..she left without telling me..~ then bel was saying: zhe zhong ye jiao pengyou ar?. haish...~ left without letting me know`.

all ryte. i'm gonna gossip and bitch now. haish. guess u all know i'm gonna say right?. yeah,it's [her]..not gonna disclose her name here but all of ya know it in our hearts =). *arghx* can i say she's a despo?. would you go steady with someone which you had barely know him for only a few hours??. harlow?!. it's like they know each other on sat for those barely few hours..and the nxt day she was already together with him,holding hands and kissing?. what the fucking hell. is she that despo for having a stead? she was jealous when she saw others happily walking away with their steads. she was jealous when we talked abt our steads. she was upset when she got rejected by a guy from other school and when she was told,that the guy was actually toying with her?. she's a vainpot who combs her hair in the class in front of a mirror for at least 5 mins. she would let her her hair down once when she was doing her jumping jets. she look pretty,yea right..but not those kind of really memerising. but she is too over reacting abt her looks?. harlow.?. haish..got kinda disappointed with her...girls shld be played hard to get,dun let guys get us to0o easily. but by her way,she was like already pouring herself to him after he said some sweet thingy..and those lovey dovey msgs he sent her?. my gawd,how can she get so.....haish..
i'm not gettin' anywhere for saying such things. btw,this is a place where i cld say all my sorrows pain joy and happiness..haish..~ anyway,this is her kind of life..?. not gonna interfere in it or what,just wish her all the best..dun go crying to ur friends when he broke the heart of urs...~

i miss irwin. haish. i'm waiting for him to gain back his trust from me. i've lost the trust in him ever since he broke those promises. his line was cut off,and i cldn't msg him. my pe period isn't the same as him anymore..he look moody everyday..~ haish,my heart aches. i want him back in my life. i wanna live with him for the rest of my live. i want to go back to the happy times together with him. i miss the shy and cute him..always scared of saying wrong things to make me unhappy or what~ hope he wun fall another girl..`haish..can't imagine if he falls for another girl nxt time?. wad am i gonna do then?. it's like already 1 month since we broke up. i must admit that life has been hard for me without him by my side every now and then..i'm suffering in pain everyday..crying every now and then just for him..`what if i lose him forever?...

havin' chem test tml. gawd hell,haish..have to start mugging right into it lers..`sad thing yeah? but i love chemistry =)

2004-08-01T21:28:00.000+08:00

hmms. didn't blog for 5 days lers.
i'm officially 15 yrs old!
yeahs. hehes,received lotsa presents and wishes from everybody =)

went to the chalet on friday. gawd,i left joanne and jacinta in school. i felt so guilty,i promised to play for them but i didn't. in the end,me and shauna recorded a instrumental version for them. then my sis came and fetch me to the chalet. hmms,stayed there alone together with my sis's friend. so lonely,then chatted on the phone with steph and yun mommy. wait till 12 lidat,got alot of msgs. hehe,then yun mommy on the phone pei wo. hehes,then later daddie&mommie called then they sing birthday song to me thru phone. gawd,i was so touched man. hehes..went to bed. but was woken up by my sis's friend and kor also. can say i didn't have a peaceful night.

[ mommy is yun aka bestie. then mommie is my real mother. dun mix them up arh. ]

saturday!. hehes,woke up at 6 lidat. mommy woke me up. then went to bathe. waited for daddie to come fetch me. wait till i fell aslp. lols..went to school,got a hug from shauna. went for band for ndp rehearsal. hmms,then went back to band room..got alot of teachings from sir. dozed off,then went to toilet with jess. gawd,everytime i come back from toilet then sir will start playing. *arghx* after band,met up with kangquan. hehe,waited for daddie to fetch me. had lunch at home then head off to chalet. reach there,did some marinating. went to the beach together with kangquan and weihsin. hehe,drew some pictures there. then wanted to take pic de,then got this small boy boy step on our drawings!. haha. then we went back to chalet,saw joanne they all. =) lols. des kor+kevin+nnq bought this big big mashimaro for me. hehes,so nice and cute!. hmms,saw junhao. my gawd,he wear pink.~ haha. rmb the joke with steph at cine there. hahas..went for cycling with jass+joanne+teeyue+rn+steph+des+kevin+justin+nnq+kangquan. did i miss anyone out?. hehes,then went to fetch jeff they all at mac there. returned the bike then went back to chalet. started the fire or shld i say i watch the guys help me start fire? lols,junhao+kevin+des+sean start the fire. then later mr foo came. gawd,missed him so much man. he got me a present too =) jamie they all came along. took many pics that night..with lotsa pple. and also lotsa kisses on the cheek from teeyue+weiqi+jamie. lols. cut the cake and everything. was smashed on the face with cake [expected]. haha,mommie helped me cleared up. then went off to the amusement park with all my friends. played this ride,was so fun..laughing my head off..~ played bumper car with them too0o..had so much fun..~ went to the beach with hsin. poured my heart out to her,she scolded me,she gave me advices. but i listened to none. i really dunno what to do. waited till 12 lidat,looked for jeff at the beach. lied on his shoulders and cried. haish. hsin and jun go patuo. then junhao and rui came at different times. junhao was talking crap [-_-'l] was freezing there..so cold man. went back to chalet,bbq some food. went upstairs and eat. caught some slp then hsin woke us up. hehe,find ways out to the beach. sat there till 6 lidat. cannot see sunrise at all. *argh* got lotsa dark clouds. went back to chalet..haish..slept on the floor..~ still 9 lidat. the guys had left..then me and hsin packed things up..~ daddie came and fetch us for breakfast. hehes...~ slept in the car..went home ard 11 lidat.. lied on the sofa,felt aslp agn till 4plus. went upstairs and slp till 6plus. gawd.. spent the whole afternoon slping. hehes..=) hmms,chouhong and tc came to my house and passed me a present =). hehes,then they left and i had my dinner.

haish. irwin asked for a patch on 26th of july. actually i was abt to patch up with him but things happened agn. i dunno why,haish. then i rejected him. my heart was so god damn pain,but all i could was to suffer in silence. i know she may read this. but i didn't let her know why i reject him cause' i dun wan her to feel guilty or what. for so long,me+yun+jass+her had gone thru so many hardships in our friendship. i dun wan to let her go,furthermore she needs my help now. yun,must learn to forget and forgive. i've nv blame her..she made me realise many things. at least i've learnt to take things in my pride. one person suffer is better than three persons. get it?. [i've written the same thing in ya blog lers] i'm not acting noble or what,but i hope u get to understand this....i want to go back to the happy times when i'm with him. i really miss him..he didn't turn up at the chalet. haish, got so upset over it. somemore rui they all made me angry,i almost burst out crying. haish,but i didn't. was so moody that night. hope to spend my future days with him~ haish. so many things left undone.

i'll end this entry with thanking all those who had spent this special day with me including those who didn't turned up. hehes,thanks for all ya presents..i will cherish them all..~ =))) lols,i'm 15 lers..

2004-07-25T10:37:00.000+08:00

currently listening to stevie b - when i dream about you. haish. my maid got me to dl this and she said she dedicate this to me. i broke down immediately when i listen. gawd,i'm so fragile nowadays. gettin' too emotional.

just woke up. slept ard 4 last night. chatted on a phone with ting,tc and two others whom i don't know at all. hmms,chatted till 2plus. one by one put down,left me and this guy whom i don't know?. he craps alot man,talk nonstop. [-_-'l] chatted till my cordless phone no batt.~ went downstairs,acc kor eat his supper. then watch tivie..~ first time in the yr i get to do this,cause' daddie usually dun let us stay up till so late. actually wanted to watch tivie till morning,but no shows at all. then went up to slp~ this morning,was woken up by a phone call by that guy whom i chatted on the phone last night. gawd,then i was so slpy man. daddie is coming home tonight?. hmms,dunno whether is he sending me to school anot. kekes.

haish. i miss him. i dun wanna place high hopes on anymore. i'm not gonna believe anything unless he tells me straight. haish..dun wanna blog lers..~

stevie b - when i dream about you

There was a time in my life
When I opened my eyes and there you were,
You were more than a dream,
I could reach out a touch you,
Girl that was long ago.
There are something's that I guess I'll never know,
When you love someone
You got to learn to let them go.

When I dream about you,
Thats when everything's all right,
Your in my arms
Here next to me, forever.
When I dream about you,
Girl you never go away,
Just close my eyes
Wait for my dreams
Cause I still love, loving you.

How can I get you to see
That I'm falling apart
Since you've been gone,
I can never be sure
I could ever let go
Your love is much to strong,
There are something's that I guess I'll never know,
When you love someone
You got to learn to let them go.

When I dream about you,
That's when everything's all right,
Your in my arms
Here next to me, forever.
When I dream about you,
Girl you never go away,
Just close my eyes
Wait for my dreams,
Cause I still love, loving you.

There are something's that I guess I'll never know,
When you love someone
You got to learn to let them go.

When I dream about you,
That's when everything's all right,
Your in my arms
Here next to me, forever.
When I dream about you
Girl you never go away,
Just close my eyes
Wait for my dreams,
Cause I still love, loving you.

2004-07-24T18:49:00.000+08:00

another sad entry. just woke up from my afternoon nap..slept for only a few hours last night. i actually cried myself to slp.

woke up at 6.30 this morning,left the house ard 7 bahx. purposely took a long ride to school,i want to be alone. walked under the rain and got myself drenched. haish. went for another rehearsal today. wet weather programme,then we were moving up and down cause' they can't hear the music. so slpy and moody this morning. but i managed to "force" out some laughter. so coincidence,irwin and the softballers were playing cards behind us at the benches there. i was feeling quite uneasy,doing alot of things to keep myself occupied so i won't let my tears drop. i keep turning ard and look at him. looking at his smiles,looking at his laughters,look at his seriousness. [seems pervertic?] my heart hurts. asked eugene last night,how was he? he replied ok larh,as pernormal. glad that he has moved on. pple will ask but why aren't i moving on yet? simple reason i dun wan to forget him as part of my life. haish. i really love him lotsa,at least i didn't break my promise. went back to band room ard 10plus. sir gave us a lecture,till i fell aslp. then got a excuse to run out by getting ms chan to photostep the scores. hehes,together with jessica. saw them agn at the bball court,i wanted to avoid but then jessica got gastric. haish. then went upstairs,played a new song agn. a japanese song,i don't know what's the title cause i don't understand japanese. hmms,the song seems nice but . quite difficult to play. first time playing a 1st flute piece by myself,sounds odd without choonwei to lead me~ hmms,then we ended practice ard 12plus. sir talked to us for "a while". stayed back after band,to have a meeting at the canteen. found myself so talkative there,sorry. cause' i can't help myself,if i'm idling..i tend to look at him cause' he's at the canteen too. haish.

i feel so stupid. why can't i get over him? budd say i'm getting zi bi lers. i have to admit that,cause' the old joanna has already left together with him since they day he left her. the old and cheerful me is gone,i can't bring myself to laugh and smile at all times. life been such a misery,i've been so lonely. felt so lost without him ard me~ he has moved on,he no longer needs me. haish. went to his blog just now,and read all his entries agn. how i wished he will say to me agn he miss me alot as what he did in the past. haish,guess his blog will be erased soon cause' xinjo is not together anymore. i'm naggy isn't it,always pondering over the past. this blog can say has became from a blissful one to a misery one.

2004-07-23T22:15:00.000+08:00

2nd entry.

is the font size to0o small? -haish- can hear the background music mar?. i'm going boners lers.
just taken my dinner. budd and mandl drop by at my house to give me early bday present. it's ex. they insisted i try on the pants. [-_-'l] they also bought a watch..all in pink..~ mommy's fav colour. hmmx,i'll be wearing it next sat kaes. dun worry. had a chat with budd outside my house then mandl inside my house playing gunbound. aiyohs.

tagboard. haish. thanks for all ya concern. i know i shld let go of him and just carry on with my life.`but sorry,i can't. i cannot forget him,he's been one part of my life. now and forever. nv will i forget him~. i still love him as much as i do in the past. my feelings may have faded but it has now returned. i took him for granted in the past..nv learnt to cherish him at all~ haish,now he's gone then i've learnt. i dun need him to feel guilty or what,cause' i know when ur feelings are gone..there's nth can help..love can't be forced~ haish,i dun blame him. i dun need pple to sympathise with me..i dun need pple to help me convey msgs to him. a part of my life is gone. i feel so lost without him. 3weeks..my gawd,everything is falling apart lers. dunno what i'm doing everyday in my life. i don't seem to have any memory abt it. nxt sat can watch sunrise lers~ i dun wan to slp that day..haish,he promised to watch it with me de..now i have to watch it myself.

haish. i dun wan my life anymore lers. livin' is such a painful stuff` tml got another rehearsal. have to wake up early agn. today nobody nag at me lers, daddie go bangkok. can slp later liao lers =) haish. i'm crying my eyes out.

2004-07-23T14:52:00.000+08:00

.three weeks.`
haish. pardon me for repeating the same thing agn and agn. i just wanna say everything out..if you're tired of it,then dun read on. irwin,if you happen to see my blog entries and you get angry or what..i'm sorry. btw,i'm not trying to gain any sympathy by writing all this..all i wrote is all from the deep bottom of my heart.

sobbing now. i don't know what's wrong with me..daddie flew to bangkok this morning. then i have to go to school myself. he didn't let me know till last night when he made the decision. my gawd,woke up so early this morning and i was like so slpy,like a living corpse. thinking that the bus would be crowded,i left home early. then took the bus and reached school ard 6.45 lidat. saw jeffrey they all learning amaths test,go disturb them but they carried on studying [-_-'l] in class,studied for amaths test,then i saw a huge bee flying here and there. i ran out of class,then later it scared britti then justin. justin jumped on lorh,so coward!. steph keep laughing..so funny..today's amaths test,i only know how to do half of the paper. wtf!. studied for the whole night. =( then later during pe,stupid mr lim made me do syrinting [issit spelled this way?]. so tiring,then i feel so tongku. was so breathless..~ after that,went to physics lab. did experiment,then i was so pekchek and moody. haish. after school still help steph with her compo.

on the way home,my tears flowed down. steph tried cheering me up but i can't. in the bus,she keep banging into me then "argued" till i laugh. hehes,what a friend. went home,listened to this saddening piece of music [recommended/introduced] by zhengxin. the one she always play at the foyer. listen liao,tears dropped like a spoilt tap. my gawd..it's now playing as my blog music..~

three weeks ler!. without him ard me,so xinku. i wanted him by my side. i dun wanna forget him,he will always stay in my heart. three weeks of tears..i didn't cry so much for a guy,including felix. haish..how did he manage to break my heart till like this. friends..are we going to remain as friends forever?. i dun wish to..haish..i'm missing him really really badly...

2004-07-22T16:56:00.000+08:00

two "major" events are over ler.
emergency sucess was ok bahs. had an early recess,then saw ambulance and police cars everything. it's seems so lame and fake nors. like a show where the whole school will be taking part. we squated at the field for quite long,and so sway..i'm having my period,then when i stand up that time..leg cramps and i almost fainted nors..`idiot,made us stood there for so long..went to hall for briefing,then i so weak and upset nors. went back to class for maths lessons then we were released early that day. racial harmony day. hmms,fun and saddening. wore a sari together with jamie and steph ytd. steph's dad fetched me and rn to school..then help steph to wear her sari after opening the class. stucked in the toilet till music starts. class was as per normal till the last two periods. had a difficulty walking ard with the sari on..almost fell down with the sari. oh my gawd,took alot of photos to0o with different cameras. hmms,those who have my face in their photos..send to my mailbox or let me know kaes. the party,went to 5c there find choonwei they all but most of the time,i stayed at my class there. haish,ate the food..took pics and jisiao pple. that's all i've done. cleared everything up and went back to class..after school,went to band room and took pics with choonwei they all agn =) then later practised my flute and slacked ard. took pics with ms chan to0o..changed my sari out and went back to the room to arrange the files and books. till 6plus lidat,recruits were dismissed and we all left.

today,raining heavily in the morning. things couldn't get into my head today. i dunno what i have learnt..everything is so messy nors. my mind is full of him. =( jonathan keep irritating me and got me so pissed off in the lab. got back my physics paper today and i scored a a1. first time in the yr man. lols. half of the class got distinction. my gawd...after recess,went to library to watch a video for chinese lesson. but i was chattering with kangquan and clement abt exco's stuff. hahas,almost laughed my head off when i knew the posts. during cme,went thru physics paper..after that,i was slping lers. so bored. after school,waited for steph. then saw zhengxin,she played piano for me leh. so sweetx. hehes. after that,went home with bel..saw mandl and budd. went home separately. haish.

today my mood was so bad. so tired and sad. i can't stop thinking of him. i'm lovin' him still. everyone asked me to move on but i can't. i really can't. seeing him laughing and smiling,really melts my heart but at the same time,it also hurts. cause' i know he's happier without me ard him. whenever i want to see him,he wun appear in front of me. but whenever i don't wan to see him,he would somehow appear in front of me. haish. saw his friendster testimonials,saw the testi i wrote for him and the testi he wrote for me. i broke down agn. i'm in no position to be jealous or what. wtf. haish. i really miss him badly..~ i want him back but i can't....

2004-07-19T20:38:00.000+08:00

*sadden* i'm still missing him badly..i hate myself for not cherishing him~..

hmms. ytd was weiqi's+yun[mommycumbestie]+choonwei. woahs,so many manx. went out with mommy in the afternoon,took some pics and walked ard town..had lunch at cine there,was shopping for presents. haish,but she doesn't seem happy that day..i don't know why,perhaps daddy2 nv msg her bahs. after that,went to meet jessica+huimei+kelly at far east. walked so far siax,mommy pei wo =) reach there lers,then mommy went to meet her other friends. took pics agn with jessica they all,then we took a bus to botanic gardens. walked so far in!!!. that place is so isolated.

reached there lers. then acs started playing..hmms,the guys are so handsome and the band music is also very nice lehs. i still tink acs better!!!. hahas,then sit there for 2hours,my gawd..i'm having leg cramps nors. then wait till st andrew's band. their outfit so cute nors..prisioners that had just escaped man. =x then got this saxophone solo..haha..can guess what i wan to say ler dui marx? hahas,that guy is sooo handsomeee and cuteee..~~~ left that area ard 7plus,walked out to the petrol station was like already cuming 8 lers. so we bought some drinks and boarded 153 back to serangoon. then on the way,saw the nkf showing on tv moblie..caught zhang xin zhe singing..oh my gawd..my childhood idol~ ehheyx...cracked alot of jokes during the bus ride..`walked to int with ziyang they all..hmm,took a bus home with ziyang. my legs almost broke nors,so painfulll...

studied for a while,turned in ard 10plus. [ssooo earrrlyyy] but no choice,i'm to0o tired lers.
this morning,almost late for school. today's lessons are so boring!. wasn't paying attention at all..my mind was wandering ard..i can't even concentrate nors. haish. during pe,had stomach cramps till so jialat nors. still need to do so many exercises,pain till i cannot stand up properly..haish..so sway,my auntie really visit nors. haish,gonna be really down and moody for the next few days. after school,went for chinese extra lessons..mr ng told us abt some war thingy,so slpy but then steph listen till so happy!. went to band,had dis new band teacher in charge,she very quiet..[-_-'l] then today only me and choonwei turn up. hahass,then the place we sit very hot so we went to saxophone there =) haha,sir dunno marx then he asked flute to play then he pointed to empty seats. hmms,played harry potter today..luckily got choonwei there then i dare to play. cuz very paiseh and pressurised..~ asked sir to buy canon in d de piece for the band lehs. yeah!!!...can play lers...~ lols,i want to learn how to play piccolo.

after band,went home together with choonwei,ziyang and kelly. reached home at 7plus..haish,the feeling is so weird. [he] always acc me go home whenever i've band de. *sadden*

tml got emergency exercise..~ no need to study so much..then on wed,is racial harmony day. hmms,gonna take pics with my band seniors.!..sstopping here..have to get started on my hwk..`

2004-07-17T21:38:00.000+08:00

well. life's been hard for me these few days.

i've been thinking of him every now and then. how to forget him? how is my heart gonna take two scars?. haish. stupid me.

today,lettme think. woken up by the thunder roars!. so scared that i couldn't slp back,just lied on my bed,using my pillows to cover my pathetic ears. slept back only ard 6 lidat when the thunderings stopped. by that time,i've to get ready for school. rushed to school,actually wanted daddie to fetch me there but he was sleeping so soundly like a pig. =x passed weiqi's present to her friend,then i ran upstairs. wth,so lil pple was there. heard that the whitley sec concert was great!. haha,they played where eagles soar. idddiott..haha,bel was so excited manz.

was running up and down for the whole morning,and i was sweating like hell. so smelly!. had rehearsal.`saw contingents marching in and out?. hahas,weiqi and shauna were the flag bearers. goh marched kinda nice leh. then wenzheng was the parade commander!. oh my gawd. ms chan there keep ka jiao..we laugh at the juniors marx,then she scold her while she was laughing herself [-_-'l] rehearsal ended early larh,we went back to band room. played a new piece,sounds quite nice but i can't find the song!. how to analyse the score?.

i was without specs for the whole afternoon. hsin told me that amaths test was on monday which totally freaked me out!. idiot,then i msg my chiobu teacher,then she came in the afternoon. i learnt blindly under her guidence. hmmx,then my brother told her she very chio from back view. hahas. went out for dinner at bedok there,then after that..sent kor to his friend's house,jie to zhonghua sec for campfire and mommie to tuition. then later go collect my specs back =) feel so much better..see so much clearer now..

just finished typing a email to emma. everytime i poured my heart out to her,i will feel much much better =) yeah!. tml going out with yun!. so happy. yeah!..

2004-07-16T22:11:00.000+08:00

another friday. two weeks of singlehood ? he asked me whether we cld be friends..and i replied anything..when i saw that msg,my heart was pumping fast with pain.

haish. i was reminded of him today when joanne and jas sang their version of guai huai fang shi..lotsa memories started flowing back..the times we had together,although little but precious. so0o0o sad..

school life..as per normal bahx`mr tanhn was absent for two days. lolx,then we had four periods in two days. had physics test today. got soo nervous that i've forgotten some of it..wtf..`after school went to heartland mall with jas and steph to get some presents =) haha,then we walked round the whole mall. it changed so much!. acc. jas to pierce another ear hole,then she insisted that we look at her [-_-'l] planned to take a bus home then after crapping for 20mins plus then i realised the bus has already changed its line. lols..then we took mrt and we saw lester and jiteng =) lols,chatted with them then i invited them to my chalet. jiteng gave us sweets and it's so minty..super hot..~ oh my gawd,i hate mint stuffs. reached home then i realised the presents are still with them..=p haha..so i waited for them~ chatted for quite some time under the block. we crapped alot man.

went home and had a nice slp till 6plus. woke up and have tuition. my chiobu teacher,bombarded me with so many things and i was like trying my best to digest everything as soon as possible. lols..btw i just finished my tuition,have rehearsal tml. first ndp rehearsal..wonder how it will turn out..~ 2 more days to mommy's birthday.! yeah..

2004-07-14T19:44:00.000+08:00

hmms. ytd was fine =)

life is as per normal now bahx. my moods are swinging very high nowadays. got so irritated and moody these few days. went for tuition ytd,met hsin they all the n&b first then i got sore eyes..so damn painful.

slept so early last night =D feeling so good. slp for full 8 hours..=p had practical in the lab this morning,bong keep fooling ard and jeff broke a test tube. lolx,went back to class for maths. managed to catch abit but still kinda confused. we had voting,then kangquan had to wear his blazer for the whole day..poor thingy..~ haha,wasn't paying attention for the rest of the day. had english remedial which we used it for corrections. helped steph to lock the classroom and everything.` hmms,went for band..had some snacks with yun =) hehes,completed my maths hwk there. practised my flute and got kinda scolded by ms chan. idiott..haiyohx,my birthday got rehearsal lehs..oh my gawd..`

so happy!. read carefully hor. i'm having a chalet at East Coast on my birthday. from fri till sun. hmms,bbq will be on sat 31 July. hehes,daddie and jie booked for me de =) oh yah,i'm inviting everyone to come..but plz let me know the names. and also..especially my psm![caro,help me inform the rest =)] impt peeps! [steph.jeff.rui.ting.yun.emma.jasss.mandl]..and friends...hehes..must come okaes?!..=)) dun disappoint me..

2004-07-12T20:05:00.000+08:00

eh heyx. feeling much better today =)

last night went for dinner at changi village. then my sister ordered fried bananas and they ate it in front of me. so sadd...i cannot eat =( felt so dizzy and weak ytd,can't even walk properly. haish.

this morning..woke up ard 6 to bathe. went to school and i forgot to bring my newspaper. wth. borrowed some sections from shauna and bluffed my way thru =) had chemistry lessons for the first period,can't get anything into my mind. haish. my pe period is the same as irwin's. today i report sick so didn't take pe lessons or i'll have to see him. went back to class..english and chinese lessons were a bore.`went for recess,can't eat anything so i just had fruits..during assembly,kangquan made his speech with his other two candidates. haiyoh,dunno what's wrong with him? haha,the way he presented his speech is so funny. oh my gawd,went back to class..then keep laughing..~ physics lesson was in a mess,haha..we don't know how to plot this farking graph..then we kept bothering mr foo abt it. gawddd...we'll be choosing malay ethnic this yr..haish..i'm forever wearing that costume..also dunno whether i shld wear that?. btw,depends whether i can borrow it anot.

went for band after school. got this small pathetic room cuz we couldn't practice anywhere else cause' of the orals and mock exams going on. having a rehearsal this saturday [agn!] for national day. wth..haish..this sunday!!!..lolx...going out with my bestiecummommy =) hope she cld make it hor?!..hmm..i'm attending two concerts =) hehes...st gb will be having a concert and there will be flute solo wor..=D yeah!. great isn't it.

sooo tired now. haish. wo de xin hao tong hao tong..zhen de hao tong..ni ting dao ler marx?. haish.

2004-07-11T13:32:00.000+08:00

Which band instrument are you?
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2004-07-11T12:28:00.000+08:00

oh yeah!. i changed my layout. hmms..i'm falling in love with the colour black...

spent the whole farking morning to work this out,hope it's nice.
geex,i feel so sick now!. haish,my whole body aches and i'm having a sore throat. been slacking since ytd,haven't touched my hwk at all..i'm gonna be so dead..~ heard bel got herself a new haircut`oh my gawd..gonna laugh at her tml =)

i'm still sad. how to move on in life?.

carolyn has moved on..but why am i still here?!

2004-07-10T22:54:00.000+08:00

i'm living in sorrows.
when can i get back my old me?
i miss myself.
i miss him.
my heart hurts whenever i see him..

was so stunned when i saw him today. tears welled up and i quickly walked away. woke up @ 6plus this morning..left house and went wandering agn. reached school and saw bel and jess. band was all right,recruits joined us today. ms chan today bo tai bo ji keep hitting me cause'of that bel sotong. so blur then ms chan keep saying she wanna die. practice ended late..was busy moving the instruments to another room to practice for national day. yeah,we're not marching. caught a flu two days ago,still not recovering from it yet..still having a reddy nose.

reached home ard 3plus,felt so shagged and depressed. slept for 3 full hours..woke up and hear mommie nagging at daddie..poor thing..~ kor cried just now,ever since we have grown up..i've nv seen him cry before even at my ggm's funeral. wtf,she really broke my brother's heart man. suckerrr. hate pple toying with other pple's feelings. fun meh?! haish. i cried too..mandl was chatting with me online abt him and i was listening to sad songs too..that's why i broke down agn.

budd is also having his own problems..haish..given my state,dun tink i will be able to help stride over his problems. i feel so useless man..hope he will get over it soo0on..carolyn,just finished reading her blog. if you happen to see this,wanna let u know,ur ps' bestie is still here. got anything just look for me to0o. u have gone thru many ups and downs with weeliang. don't give the relationship up..u loved each other deeply,it's just both ur attitudes..try giving in to each other. pardon me for not being a good adviser,i don't know how to change your thinking(who ask u to be so strong)..wish u all the best with him kaes. if u love a person,try letting go. if it comes back,that means that u're meant to be together..~

haish. this whole month isn't a month of love..witnessed so many pple breaking up. a sad month instead..wtf..why do i always learn to cherish one person after he had left...

2004-07-09T21:49:00.000+08:00

friday lers. haish..one week without him.

today is a bad day for me. got this emergency exercise..got so damn dulan+angry. nb..ms kodi and ms chan so damn biased lorh. iddioottt..! our clz report missing pple what,then it's like steph and yixian not sure abt who is on duty or whatever. then ms chan was yelling her head off at steph and yixian while ms kodi was embarassing our clz. wtf nors. then other sec 3 classes also report pple missing,they just slowly tell them or rather talk to them softly. not as much as us lorh. wtf sia..make us sooo dulanx...stupid kodi always biased towards us.

was stuck there for quite long. went back to class and was so fedup. haish..i broke down agn in class~ haish..i thought my tears had dried up already. then some quarrelling happened..haish..today just simply sucks` after recess,went to physics lab. did some experiments and we were called for phototaking. i sat in front again!. wtf man..together with teeyue,jamie and joanne. *joanne is soo sweet nowadays..~ then the informal photo was kena pushed by rongna. after school..went mac with eeting+rn+steph+eunice+shaun`hmms,had lunch there..joking ard,pouring our hearts out..haish..went home and went to slp...so shagged..i don't wanna think of anything...`

ytd. went out with rn+ty+steph+jas+qirui,went to ps to watch mean girls. it's so funny`what a bimbo..lolx..~ went to toilet after the movie ended,then steph realised her hp was left at the threatre. what a sotong..~ ran up and down looking for it..and dunno where the secruity is leading us to..`then my mother kept calling me to rush me home for tuition. *arghs*..

haish. my brother is such a actor..wtf man..i don't know how fast or long is this gettin' into his ears..but don't give me the excuse of pple tell me de..~ suxs nors..read then read larhx..what's the pnt of hiding..wanna gossip..? just ask me can anot..`haish...

i'm getting from bad to worst..why am i having my beloved brother now?...

2004-07-07T17:07:00.002+08:00

gee..i'm getting lazier everyday..`

monday was a holiday. went out with yun and ting. met yun @ s'goon int and took a bus to far east to get my bag. after that,went to heeren to meet tingz. was stopped by some salesgirl to join a ladies' club? i joined it and that person messaged me in the middle of the night at 3plus to thank me. wtf. walked into heeren and saw sotongcumpig together with him and his friends,ran out of heeren with yun and went in thru the back door. haish. when i want to see,he always don't appear but whenevr i don't want to see him,he would appear. saw nikki there to0o..

walked ard heeren,waited for ting and then we went off to cine to check the movie tickets. but don't have the show we watched to watch then we went to have our lunch @ long john silver. saw yun's ndp friends there. then we headed to take pics..turned out quite nice..~ saw bm,wendy they all. after that we went home ler. reached my house ard 6plus. was wandering ard the area then i saw my mother and she asked me what i was doing. haish,then she rushed me home. i wanted to be alone,i don't want to go home. haish. the moment i reached home,steph called me to go out. told her that i wasn't in the mood. next day was school..

tuesday,tried avoiding him as much as i cld. steph made me cry during maths lesson. she kept harping on that thingy. haish. found out abt eeting thingy to0o. gave each other hugs every time we see each other. so sad,why so coincident. was released early on that day @ abt 1.15pm. went home quite early. mommie got me a tamagotchi connection,together with my sister. she's crazy abt it..?~

today,all right larh. didn't cry. a good thing yeh. haish. keep peeping @ him,couldn't help it. received lotsa consolations. thanks! but perhaps only time will heal bah. i don't know if i shld blame him or what. why his words always seem to be so contradicting? one told me this and another told me a different thing. who to believe? haish..life is miserable..~ got my locker lock number today..placed almost all my textbooks in it..together with rn+steph+jamie..~ had nsw competition after school,stayed back till 3 plus..
signing off..

2004-07-04T23:38:00.000+08:00

pardon me for not updating for soo damn long. so many things happened [that's of cause'].

haish. story ended so don't keep asking me what happened. it ended 2 days ago,suddenly and unexpectedly. cried for many days. trying to recover now,with the help with all my friends who were by my side. let go of the past and move on in life. i may meet nicer and greater guys. he bluffed me,where are all my promises and where is my forever?! haish. what's abt loving someone?.

thanks guys. for being there with me during the bad times of my life. thanks... carolyn for making me accepting the facts which i had nv choose to face. yun for being the first one to be there. sotong cum pig for cheering up with ya lame jokes. rui for turning up at the cc even though u are sick.

hmms,so sickly and sad for the past few days. got so many band practices. quite reluctant to go at first cause' of my mood but i still turn up. choonwei's jokes made me laugh,sir's dancing made me smile. had public performance today,got so nervous. i've been doing lotsa exercise for the past few days. carried lotsa heavy things,climbing up and down the stairs. sustained some scatches but it didn't hurt. had late lunch for the weekends,got so tiring. totally shagged when i reached home today. slept for one hour plus and i went out to meet steph for a chat. many pple are getting to know what happened.

haish. many nice movies are up. oh yeah,of cause' is mean girls =) the show i've been wanting to watch. hmms,still got windstuck [ye mum si jie]. that show is great to0o. hmms,went to watch with my cousin and sis on the last day of holidays. thinking it was a comedy. but after half of the show,i started crying badly. it's so touching and heart-wreaking. wtf,i was struggling. haha,cause' i didn't bring any tissue. went home ard 10 plus,went into the mrt with a reddy nose. so paisehx.

got a new physics teacher called mr fo0o. i admit that he teaches better =x no offence. at least i get to understand physics. he's our co form and ms yap is our new form teacher. she's nice and strict. one week of schooling past,get to understand lessons more. didn't slp in class,was paying more attention. =)

tml meeting steph to get a new baggy. cheer myself up abit. dun wanna stay at home and think. haish. getting a new layout to0o..dun wan to be reminded of everything. it suxs..`

2004-06-22T22:53:00.001+08:00

nb. hsin arh,whatever irwin say is none of ur fucking business. uncivillised,mind you. what is the meaning of uncivillised? are you fit to say that? are you that "civilised". violent?. irwin said don't come to school next time. does it mean beating a person up? use your common sense,that sentence can mean anything..~ what are buddies to guy mean for? standing up for one another..so what's wrong with irwin doing that? Im sure if something happens to ur "sisters" , u surely also stand up for them de mah..or perhaps it only applies to normal pple. wtf is this man, calling other people uncivilised.. doesnt mean that ur studies better than other people doesnt mean taht u can discriminate other people! Eat ur words! whatever comments you have,dun ever tag on my board. cuz this blog is mine,i like to write my own things.

-sighs- i'm so exhausted now. rui is back =) went for joanne's birthday bbq ytd. i asked kor to acc me,he don't want but in the end,i saw him turning up together with his friends [-_-'l|] the party was bore at the start but when it came to cutting cake,it was fun. haha. i was smashed on my face with the cream cake by steph,followed by rongna,joanne and jamie. it was so fun =) lolx.

went for band today. was feeling so hyper and hot. but i was slpy in the afternoon and sir keep making me run errands for him in the afternoon. a living corpse walking ard. haha,choonwei and hilda keep making me laugh. and sir said i was crazy`after band,changed my clothes and went to tpy mrt station look for rn and steph. yeeping acc me there =) so good. thankx sweetie. hehe,jasss turned up too. then we took 88 to paris ris int. wtf,the bus journey was so freaking long. one hour plus,we crapped joked fooled in the bus as if the bus belonged to only us. hahaz,reached jt's chalet at 8 plus. we gave up and took a cab there,haha. had dinner and played a few rounds of cards. jt kept winning,and of cuz there's lotsa jokes. left ard 9plus cuz jass father arrived. we walked out of the chalet then we saw a dog barking,we tout it was locked up or whatsoever. when we saw it was on loose,we started running but later we stopped and stood there for jass father to arrive. it's so scary. then there's also another bunch of boys kena chased by the dog too. the dog ran damn fast,we were already in the car. luckily the boys stopped too or else they will be sooo dead. reached home at 10plus. had a quick bathe and went online =)))

there's still band tml. in the morning only =) jeff is dropping by tml to get his chinese project done. i'm turning in now...so tired after such a long entry...

2004-06-21T10:57:00.000+08:00

*sighs`-. i'm not joanna anymore.

i don't feel myself anymore. all the things i've done for the past few weeks seems not to be in my control. my life is in a mess,my story is in a mess,my everything is in a mess and i've done anything to help or salvage it.

i've been giving him cold shoulders and chose nt to meet him. what the hell am i doing? the story may be ending and yesh i know. but i just can't bring myself to do so. he's upset,he's sad. i know. -sighs- neither i wan to go0o go nor get hurt. wtf is this thing?! why is it so complicated?! all the advices i got was nt to let go,they wanted to see a story that nv ends..but why it doesn't last?..-sighs-

today is joanne's birthday. will be turning up for her bbq later. hmms,hopefully i won't be tempted by the spicy and fried food stuff. -grrrr-

did i mentioned my parents are back?. hmms,back on sat night. mom bought me a jeans and a top,kor got 2 oversized shirts,jie got lotsa tops. dad brought fruits back,he also bought lychee! which i can't eat with my current voice?! so saddening. went to band on sat morning,managed to sneak out of the house before my sister woke up. lolx,then later she got fed up and called the school =x i told her i didn't play my instrument. haha,but i still got =) reached home but she didn't lectured me. sunday morning,was grilled on the phone by weilin's sister. gawd,all my brother's fault. i was dumbfounded by her idiotic questions. was also accused for nth!. my gawd...stopping here,steph is dropping by anything now..~ or maybe she's nnot...=) takkaire..

2004-06-18T20:16:00.000+08:00

my blog is gonna be dead.

was kinda lazy for the past few weeks where i cld slack all day long. mom flew to beijing on sat and dad joined her on tues =( saddening?! both parents nt at home. they will be back on sat =) which is tml nite.

i went for my mastercourse on monday. it was fun manx,the flutist was so fun-loving and skillful. was late for the class but there were pple later than us =) went for band on tuesday. was made to play old songs,and some new one as we'll be having our first public performance @ braddell heights' cc. after band,went for tuition. reached home abt 8++,then watched tv till 3plus in the morning. the nxt day was hell,the day where i got really sick. guess i overtire myself too much,shld have gone to bed early that day. took some med and rested in bed for the whole day. temp reached till 40 degrees. got a shock man,i even lost my voice. sick for two whole days. went to see a doc,took my tem..gave me lotsa medicine. if my fever didn't subside,i may have to take a blood test. luckily it subside,or else it's gonna be hurting. feeling so wobbly now,gonna take my medicine soon. cancelled all my tuition for these few days. was too weak to get anything into my head,actually i wanted to go ahead with my maths tuition but my sis dun allow and she called victor when i was aslp. [-_-'l|] shit,he's gonna give me a headoff the nxt lesson. -sighs-

dunno whether i shld turn up for band tml. doc advised me to stay @ home. but i want to go for band =x i'mmm soo bad..i miss my seniors..~ =p getting new pieces tml yea?! gonna analyse my score now...hasn't been practising..~ die..

oh ya,just wanna apologise to jas for nt turning up @ her bbq,cuz i'm t0o sick t0 go. jeff having a bbq t0day to0o. but i can't turn up t0o. dun wan to be tempted by to0o fried stuff. have to get well so0on cuz i'm having a whole week of band practise nxt week....wish me luck..`

2004-06-10T14:19:00.000+08:00

pardon me for not updating for the past few days. was gettin' a lil lazy and busy..

hmms,stef left for aus ytd. rui left for m'sia ytd afternoon,and manz was back ytd. had a nice long chat with stef before she leave =) lolx,chatted on many things. miss her soo much siaz,rui leh..not sure how long is he planning to stay in m'sia. heyx,no one is acc me to play online games anymore,u better be back soon!. manz,haven't been seeing him online since ytd. gawd,where have u been?!

well,on sunday.went for my cousin's wedding.`reached there then we know that most of my cousins went to k-box cause' they didn't want to attend the wedding. gawd. was so bored for the whole day.
-thinks back- on monday,i think i went out with dearie. oh yah,we went to watch harry potter =) lolx,then got two guys sitting beside me..wondering whether they are gays anot..`gawd,the show wasn't as bad as what pple thinks. i thinks that it's all right,though it's short. on tues,i went for band. choonwei came and both of us keep fooling ard. lolz,i kept on scolding my junior and recruit. what the hell,i may be fierce or whatever. but that is only what i cld do,whatever i said..they wouldn't listen. freak manx,i was like so pissed off when they showed me their attitude. fuck. after band,went for tuition. i was late cause' i stayed back for band to help the recruits with their thingy. ytd,the first day i started touching my holiday hwk. =p haha. i started off with maths. such a bummer. at night,had maths tuition to0o. quarrelled with my tutor. he keep threatening me with irwin thingy lorh. what the fuck. irwin isn't the one that is affecting my studies. then he keep requesting for another tuition day. freaking hell,holidays is meant for relaxing and sometimes catching up with the schoolwork nors. does he want the whole 4 weeks to teach us maths. so what if i fail my amaths?! i only failed mid yr nt Os. fuck lorhx. no one is giving me stress now yet he's the one. yea,i'm always the one who is disappointing him. and hsin is the one who is the best. fuck man,sooner or later..i will go crazy..but before that,i might quit the tuition. the most is i find another tutor. i don't want to go thru such torturing..i'm not his toy..~ -arghx-

so slpy now..just finished clearing all my past textbooks together with k0r..got alot of reference books from my sister. cause' we're also clearing hers,so coincidence,she also took double pure. lolx,she got alot of notes and past year papers. =) gonna have my nap first before starting with my hwk..~ =p

oh yah,i just linked xuanz up. and change rui's,dearie's,mandl's link. they changed their blog sites =)

2004-06-05T16:33:00.000+08:00

Life is a song - sing it.
I am
Life is a game - play it.
Am i?
Life is a challenge - meet it.
There's too many challenges i thought
Life is a dream - realize it.
How come i'm facing the harshful reality?
Life is a sacrifice - offer it.
Does it worth the sacrifice?
Life is love - enjoy it.
Love hurts @ times..how to enjoy?!

am i expecting form him to0o much where i do get hurt sometimes when he doesn't does the thing i expected him to do. i'm upset now and no one cares. he said i was reluctant to help him with his bloggie when i got frustrated. is that how he thinks abt me? does he really knows what i'm thinking abt? since last night,all he asked was his blog. nth else,i was so bored. he only told me when he was going offline. haish,gawd. waited for his msg for the whole morning and afternoon..and i took the initiative to msg him,then he said he was slping. does he really care abt me? -sighs- so hurt..i sound so ridiculous..i dun wan any apologies..i dun wan neglection..i dun wan history to repeat itself..

-sighs- tml is my 2nd month with dearie,but i cannot go out..so sad..~ have to wake up early tml to go my cousin's house. a cousin whom i've nv seen b4 @ all. the day is gonna be bored..

2004-06-04T17:00:00.000+08:00

*weez,i'm here..away from my piggin' =)

kaes,life is still on for me. havin a headache now,it suxs..*argh*
met up with my primary school mates ytd. woahs,we caught up alot..yeah?! but they didn't change as much as i expected =x lols

Jhawn is still as lame..Carolyn is still as crappy..Shermien is still as crazy..Shihan is still as sweet..Shalyn is still as cute..hahax..~ The whole load of us went over to Jiteng's house to slack,the guys were already there. well,as expected..they were god damn tall..~ glad that i'm not the shortest there =x haha..Shalyn asked abt irwin the moment she saw me..hehes..had lotsa of girls talk among us..fun yea?

i left @ ard 7plus,went to meet irwin @ gardens. chatted for a while,then i waited for the carolyn they all @ circus. gawd,they took damn long to came over..irwin left when they arrived..he was just acc-ing me..~ hehes,headed to mac. had sundae,cause' i'm still feeling bloated cause' of the pizzas. m0mmmie called @ 10plus to rush me home..geez..i'm still having fun` all of us went home,i took the same bus as shihan.

maybe meeting up with them nxt wed =) hahax. slacked for the whole day @ home. helping mommie with her stuff..she's leaving the week after..daddie will be joining her 2 days later cause' he's busy. oh yeah,hope my sis wun be home to0o..then i wld be able to t0n @ steph's house =) lols..gettin' excited..

end with a msg to dearie,i miss ya loads..even though we just met last night..~ =x hehe,dear..iLu..no matter what happen,my heart will always belong to you..no one wld be able to snatch me away from you =p

2004-06-01T23:15:00.000+08:00

i'm so0o0o0o tired and upset now..

had a tiring day today..caused my whole body to ache..
stayed up late together with m0mmie and k0r to watch deep blue sea last night. -terrifying- woke up @ 6.30 to bathe and get myself ready for school. dearie waited for me downstairs,then we went to school together. reached school at 8,luckily wasn't caught late =x i'm supposed to reach there @ 7.30` stayed in band for a whole b4 attending the workshop.

got really fed-up with my freaking junior,dunn0 what the hell is she ever gonna read this..i can't really survive with her alone..cause she's always acting cute?..showing me attitude and treating me as her slave. gawd..is this the role of a section leader?! fark man,if that's the case..i rather give it up..!! scolded her for uteen times but what i get is her farking face and her attitude..

-sighs- went for the workshop,mr paul corrected on our projects and he requested us to redo it and pass it to him on the first day of school but we still have to send a draft to him thru email. went back to band,and i was like so damn dulan. just bluffed my way thru the practice and sir made me run lotsa errands for him...~ had lunch with van,siling and jessica @ mac.

after band,went for tuition @ central. rushed there in the rain,so shagged. the cherz managed to cheer me up but my mood was on and off..was hyper one minute but not for the next min..my mo0od suxs..~ my cherz was like puzzled why hokkien words always have to do with human body parts..all of us was like laughing our heads off..~ what a question he asked...

msg-ed dearie after tuition,called him when i reached home. dunn0 why i got really upset after calling him.. -sighs- i don't feel myself today,the things i've done doesn't seems like the usual me..` having mo0od swings now..miss dearie so0o much but just can't bring myself to touch my hp.. *manz,i need a listening ear..........why are u always playing ur games? [-_-'l|]....

2004-05-31T22:01:00.000+08:00

let's see...

kaox,i'm still in a great shock. fark!!! learn to cherish the things beside ya..dun regret till it's gone... we're gonna miss him...

-sighs- school holidays start today. went out with steph to shop for clothes and also catch a movie =) watched confessions of the teenage drama queen,it's funnie and nice. then went down to far east to shop for clothes. bought a skirt..`have to attend a wedding on sun~ kaox,my 2nd month with dearie leh...m0mmie say must go..`suxs..

went to meet dearie on the way home =) these few days he keep coming down to meet me,so good hors?!..we keep walk here and there,then in the end we decided to go home nors. he sent me home,on the way..saw yuxuan,my sis's friend. then she keep disiao. reached home,my sister they all having party. don't know what the hell they're doin. practise dancing..what the hell..

-sighs- -sighs- -sighs- i'mmmm soooo borredddddd...tml is gonna be a busy busy day...~

2004-05-30T20:05:00.000+08:00

geex..

i'm sooo full now =) lolx. went out to buy food at chomp*2 then had dinner at home. ate soo much,miss the food there. mommie keep stressing me cause my studies. fuck!.

laze at home for the whole day. had a terrible headache`ate a few panadols,but it didn't help. watched tivie for the whole morning and afternoon..gAwd..tv-addict~

well,good luck to those taking their Os tml..=) especially my band seniors...`!!! lols...

2004-05-29T21:59:00.000+08:00

typed an entry in the afternoon but it didn't turn out.
-sighs- i'm overwhelmed by lotsa emotions now.
jie talked to me abt exams stuff,friendship stuff and of cause irwin..she asked me to let go since my results are suffering now. not suffering because of him but because i'm taking a big jump from sec 2 to sec 3. and she's afraid that i can't cope with so many problems. but i'll nv let go..`i'm afraid of losing him...

slept at 2 last night,was reading my book when daddie came into my room and nagged. woke up early this morning..i forgot to find my chem test and also do the chem calculations. it suxs,just pulled myself out of bed and started struggling. went to school for the forum,daddie chose to sit in front. the speaker was fine,cheerful adult. went on for quite some time and then students were allowed to have a break to go back to their classes. i played ard with matthias's sister and wanling's brother. sooo cute,but once i said that..steph and beautrice will start to tense me..

jacky tan came at ard 10plus? when all the parents were released from the forum. -sighs- he gave a talk to the parents abt our attitude,behavior..the same old things..`and the queue was like so slow. waited damn long..=( was scared,my results were poor..~ i failed my english for only abt 0.2%!! what the hell..!!! my amaths..suxs..and my double sciences suffered cause of my english..~~ gawd..luckily,jacky tan didn't baotou me or i'll be sooo dead...

was so touched by jie and daddie for the entire day. daddie told me that results don't matter much..as long as u studied hard for it,tried ur best..he wouldn't blame me..~ but i can feel the disappointment in him..i was soooo guilty...

met up with dearie just now. he just dyed his hair to copper brown =) not that obvious but hope he won't be caught by any teachers. chatted for a while and i have to go home..~ so afraid of leaving him...i don't want to..nv ever want to..`i miss him sooo much,couldn't acc him on 1st of june..`-sighs- i'll having a busy day on that day,from morning till night. suxs..

2004-05-28T18:34:00.000+08:00

i'm sooo dead..

-sighs-i'm gonna have a scolding tml. my results are dropping drastically,i failed my english and everything failed. what the hell!. my results just suxs to core and imagine what kind of opinions jacky tan would tell daddie and daddie would just scold me like hell or maybe just disappointed. but i prefer him to scold me back to my senses but not pull a long face and think that i'm following my brother's steps. -sighs-

last day of school..`
watched shrek in the morning. kinda bored cause' i preferred shrek2. played with steph they all,and they kept tensing me cause' i had a perfect view of dearie marx. jamie kept hitting me and steph kept shooting me till i bwg! [-_-'l|] then after a while,was feeling so slpy. then i slept,lied on rn's back =x then had recess,went back to class then we had cleaning. other classes didn't clear as much as us,we still had to mop the floor,clean the fans and lights. gawd,me and jamie went downstairs to bring the mop up and down. then jacky tan was changing the class committee,hsin said i'm the ne rep. [-_-'l|] ehs..i don't want! it's terrible..`ms yap made us stayed back to tidy the files and corrections till 1plus.

went cp with steph+rn+eunice. steph wanted to buy meowtheng's birthday present,after that..we went to have lunch. i ate old chang kee =) lols,acc eunice to find jobs and we went home. slept for 2 hr plus,i just lied on the sofa..planning to read my book~ [-_-'l|]

-sighs- i'm losing hope..

2004-05-27T19:46:00.000+08:00

Didn't update ytd..
It was Hsin's 15th Birthday =) hmms,but she seems to detest her birthday alot. Had a boring day in school,had some cca quiz and some talk. The school would be reviewing whether we would be allow to bring hp to school. w0ohs..* finally straighten their thinking. Went home straight after school,wanted to catch some slp but i can't. it was raining heavily,and my mind went wild. called steph and went over to her place to view tape,but in the end..it was nthx. had dinner together with her,then headed off to hougang mall. borrowed books and bought some things. realised that both of us cld actually read each other's mind at times. lols..went home ard 9plus.

woke up late this morning,and i rushed everything agn. i didn't pack my bag agn and i just put everything into it =) lols. had some kind of science practical thingy to do. my mind was blank,can't think of any experiments at all. struggled for maybe abt an hour before i finally thought of it. gawd,then i passed up my english file with some corrections uncompleted. then went for maths trail,had it in dearie's class. hehes,then rn and jamie was getting too involved in the game and they kept screaming [-_-'l|]

after school,went to bishan with rn and yx. watched shrek2. lols,had a great laugh in there. b4 the movie start,went to mac to have our lunch. was feeling so damn hungry. then saw this actor at the threatre. lols..rn was so pissed off by the kids..~ walked ard the mall after the movie,acc-ing yx to buy his baggy. but he didn't buy it at the end,saw van and dan at mos burger then van mistaken yx as irwin. [-_-'l|] she always does it. aiy0hs. went home,had a great slp =) finally,slp for 2 hours. then had dinner with k0r. oh yeah,my parents and my sister won't be at home during mid-june. lols,then i told kor i want to ton at steph house. then he said,daddie will call every night. i must wait for his call then i can go out =p lols,then he said..ask irwin ton here larh,i was like..then i asked him to ask his gf to ton here t0o larh. he bwg!..kaes,stop here...i really miss dearie alot`..-sighs-..

2004-05-25T22:21:00.000+08:00

i'm terribly sad today.
-sighs- i cried just now..miss dearie lots and lots.

anyway,ytd's was k0r's 17th birthday. had band practice,it was fine..feeling kinda weird,no one to talk to or play with. just sit there staring into the space or dozing off. dearie waited for me,then he sick. =( k0r saw us walking home [-_-'l|] slacked till 1 plus,was watching jurassic park with m0mmie,jie and k0r =) then we keep laughing at our childhood times`

had only 5 hours of slp man. woke up late this morning,then daddie nag. then rushed everything,forgot to pack my ss testbk and chem wrbk in my bag. gawd,so forgettable. i'm so blur in school today. fell down while walking down the stairs =x walao,so pain lehx. then i keep banging into pple in school. had line dancing today,was so bored then i had a challenge with shauna. lols,she won cause i was distracted by weiqi`! oh yah,i was also squashed by jas+jamie+rongna. i tink so,also dunno how many pple. i bent down to tie my shoelace and they were playing and they fall on me. so painful sia my hip. =( after line dancing was video viewing. the movie was so boring and lotsa of us actually fell aslp and caught by mr phoon. lols,i dozed off but i managed to get a picture of what it the movie abt =) then mr phoon started "insulting" our clz.

after school,changed and went to mr jacky tan's place. he showed us a video abt band formation. it was kinda boring in the start and i was so slpy cuz i din have enough slp. the movie was fine..the moves were fantastic manx. nice and powerful.` will our future standard be lidat? lols..his daughter was also very very cute..skipped my english tuition,managed to bluff my way thru =) lols,then i went to hougang mall on my own. walk ard and borrowed some books. was missing dearie so much till i cried. really felt very very sad manx. -sighs-

went to meet sL3 and rn moodless. they started chatting abt dreams stuff,and i started laughing. fine,at least..i cheered up abit..`manz gave me a call b4 i left my house and chatted for quite a while. hmms,take it easy manz. =) i'm always a jie of urs. rmb that! i'm so slpy now,mommie gave me a ice-cream and cotton candy. =p sweet stuffs. lols...

well for my results,see liao..wo xin heng tong leh..do i really deserve such results after studying alot. -sighs- i'm losing my confidence and hope in life......

2004-05-23T21:32:00.000+08:00

rotting at home..

=x hehes,actually planned to make a trip down to hougang mall but i'm lazy. stayed at home the whole day to watch lotr 1&3. steph can't find her part 2..

woke up early this morning,went down to chinatown to have breakfast and buy crabs..lolx..the crabs turned out nice =) but my dad bought a huge fish,and he gave me almost all. and the fish was so damn big size,gawd..just have to push it down my throat`.ohhh,daddie cut his finger while eating the crab and mommie got nervous cuz of the report on the bug thingy and she did some cleaning [-_-'l|] feeling so bloated now...

i dunno how to do my physics corrections -sighs- have to wait till tml to get it done,getting back my other papers tml. get more disappointed?. waiting for my show to start now..summer holiday =) watched it b4 bt i want to watch it agn. hehes..dearie now online..have to concentrate yea..=p

2004-05-22T20:20:00.000+08:00

fffreakkk asss...

saw the newspaper report on the maid abuse thingy. it was so cruel..felt so sympathetic for her..~ ='( hell to the employers!!

hmms..went out with steph today =) made a new ezlink cardd..and then we headed off to town. bought a new ear stud and some bands..planned to take photos but the shop was to0o crowded. bought presents..still have one more to go..i'm sooo broke...

steph had a great great day today..for "shooting" me for every thing i said. and i was shut by her lots of time [-_-'l|] went to her house after towning..together with rongna. ehs,we watched freaky friday. it's nice,funny and funky t0o yea =)

-sighs- dearie nowadays very sad. there's no way i can contact him or what..can only wait till monday. and gawd,i have band on that day t0o. -sighs- missing him alot,today nv contact him at all..wondering what's he doing at home? =(

stop here then...dearie,i love you. muz take care of urself hors...~~~

2004-05-22T10:01:00.000+08:00

*sadden*

going out later,hmm..steph acc-ing me to make a new ezlink. -sighs- maybe going out tml t0o..to get some presents and catch some movies..~ wondering who i get to acc me..=(

just finished watching mr deeds. it's a funny show =) was supposed to watch finish last night,but daddie rush me upstairs cause if i dun slp then kor wun slp..[-_-'l|] and beczu of dat,i missed the repeat of my show which was the last episode =( -sighs- had a nice chat with *emma..she's great =) hanging out with her during the holidays...god damn long i didn't get to meet her..wonder how she looks...~ afraid that i wun be able to regconise her when i meet her..`=p

i'm so hungry now,maid went out to get my photos and my breakfast =) everyone is still slping soundly. oh yahs,i've got a bad news this morning. my oldest hamster died this morning. -sighs- she lived for 2yrs plus. haven told my sis yet,don't want to dampen her mood,she's enjoying herself there..wait till she comes back on monday..wonder how is she gonna take it..she dotes on that one..

having a birthday celebration for my brother on sunday,it's his birthday on monday =) oh yeah,got a mp3 player for him [-_-'l|]..he requested for it..so unfair,shld have requested for it for my coming birthday and i would have gotten a new hp for my results last yr..=( hope he really bucks up with his studies which he dun even give a damn abt it..~~~ let's hope he will get enlightenment..

dearie? slping or watching tivie? or having his breakfast..-sighs- can't contact him..wonder what he's doing now..~ miss him badly.....

2004-05-21T21:35:00.000+08:00

what to say today?...

results? fared badly..that's what i can really say? hmms..i studied hard for it and it seems useless by gettin such results back` =( i want to kill that kevin! pressurised by him..always getting good results..and he finds it too low?`gawd...

dearie's sad cause' his phone is confiscated and soon it will be mine =x i'm using it t0o much nowadays..nobody's bothering me now. jie went for her class chalet,kor studying for exams..parents in the room? -sighs- i'm bored...

had a whole string of free periods today,besides getting back our results..we're left to chat among ourselvees. hehes,slping was also allowed! of cause i got slp in clzz..=p lols...had only 5hours of slp last night..~ spent the whole day slacking..band will resume on monday =)))) yeahs!..sec4s stepped down..gawd,my batch will take over..wonder how will it be like? the feeling is gonna be weird...`

watched moulin rouge today =) it's nice yeahs..touching..i didn't cry this time cause i was running in and out the kitchen looking for food...~ =p lols...gonna watch lotr later...`hehes...take care..

2004-05-20T21:44:00.000+08:00

pigging out for the whole day =)

guess what i've done for the whole day? spent my time on my favourite hobby =p feeling kinda energetic now

gawd..everyone has probably spent their tym shopping,or catching up with the trend or whatsoever while only me spent my time slping =x hahas..

gettin' back my results tml,have a bad bad feeling that i won't fare well. -sighs- daddie came and asked me how would i fare abt my amaths. [-_-'l|]

-sighs- wonder how's dearie now? he's sick,having a bad headache now. mommie's using the phone and she said is something impt. impt in what sense where she can laugh so loudly. what a lier.

an achievement. i cleared my room within 2 hours but still left with some. gonna tidy it some other times..have to spend the weekend shopping for presents. hmms..finally going town. oh yahs,i have to get a new ezlink card. what the hell..i didn't lose my card,it just won't work. and the bus driver told me to get a new one. so troublesome...

nth else to update anymore,just miss my friends and dearie lots..gonna catch up with them during the holidays...=)) tc peeps...

2004-05-19T23:00:00.000+08:00

*hooray* -shout out louds-
midyr are over..have the chance to enjoy myself before starting on my catching-up. didn't have the chance to go out today cause' steph sick..poor girl..~ poor me too,having to slp at home whole day. take carrie gerx...

emaths paper is fine,have the confidence to pass xD lols,mr tan was bored then chatted with him. he was looking through the paper and he said it's easy,should be able to finish the paper fast. well,for physics paper..requires lotsa thinking (as usual) but not much calculations. i rmb-ed studying some questions on the tys,but my memorising skills are bad so i'm not sure whether i got it correct,and some questions are really really lame. made me think so long for that freaking answer..

was badly demoralised with ytd's paper. geography,i knew how to do the structured questions but not map-reading. what the hell..chinese paper,the compre was damny difficult and i forgot some of the answers. worst was amaths paper,i have confidence to pass the paper with all the preparation,but upon having to complete it within 2 hours was impossible. was feeling so sad after that day's paper..

met up with the usual peeps just now,at ard 8plus. supposingly at 8 but i can't make it cause' i have to make a trip to hougang mall. hmms,was slpy there. slacked till 10 bahs,then steph leave cause she had to take her medicine.

my com is laggy now. i have to reformat the whole thing agn. it suxs man!`freak. have to store my thingy on web or my sis's com. staying home tml,have to really sort things out and tidy my room`. [-_-'l|]

dearie tml still having exams. hope he can do the papers smoothly =) miss him really lots. hasn't been talking to him much nowadays cause of the farking exams. hehes,can only talk in school. hmms,then today he come find me in the evening..chatted for 1 hr plus then he went home =) sweetx bahs..~ i'm falling kinda deep in..real deep..xD guess he's aslp n0w..`just wanna let him know,i'm missing him baddly...........

2004-05-14T20:50:00.000+08:00

wEeee...

hehes,god damn long din get to update this bloggie`i'm not changing it,so don't worry. =) hmms,something's wrong with my computer these few days and i didn't get to update it for the past few days. not sure whether is it because of the virus or because of daddie. -sighs-

examss started on 13 May,it suxs`i'm sitting right in front,my view is magnified,vision was kinda blur. don't really have much confidence for the past few papers. hope i can concentrate more on the nxt few papers and pass this midyr.

erms..lotsaa things happened these few days. can only say is mostly bad bahs,cannot really msg dearie much these few days..my parents are kinda complaining. then jeff leh,keep kb me in school. oh yeah,what have i done agn?!`he's the one who's seeing me not happy. gawd,forget it. he would flareed up his temper when he see's this..-sighs- feeling uncomfortable if i mit them and i will feel more worst when i see them chatting among themselves. what the hell....

away those unhappy stuff. -arbish- i'm missing dearie hell lots =( cause of the farking exams. -sighs- hope exams end really really soon then we can go out together..=p after the paper today,i acc dearie till his next paper start. i can leave after my first paper =) rn+steph+jas+jamie waited,then headed off to mac nors. had really great fun and laughter there`then rn and me was like laughing at the advance level,where we can laugh till no voice can come out and tears flow out. lols,then rn ate hell lots. she's real hungry and big eater =x coincidently,dearie and his fwenz came to mac =) budden dearie nv acc me home,he was eating so i didn't make him pei wo hui jia. hmms,got hit by steph on the bus when the bus "jerked"..and.....me and rongna was the unlucky ones as we sat at the "wrong place"..`lols...

had a great slp today,away from stress =) oh yeah,gonna start studying soon...tuition with mommie. another boring one. oh ya,i went back to school with steph to get my chem file. ms yap called me to get it but i said i will get it on monday. hehes,then we wore home clothes in and everyone was looking at us =x i mean the teachers =x ehs...we're stopped by some staff in the school but we still got thru =p hehes..then later steph studied at my place. had a great chat...without studying..lols.....`

stopping here...tc peeps..

2004-05-09T16:25:00.000+08:00

qquicckk uuppdatee..~~

hehes..going out soon to fetch m0mmie =) my sis is going t0o..[-_-'l|] being forced to go..lols...i'm soo hungry n0wwwwww

t0day is m0ther's day,just gave m0mmie a b0uquet of roses and some hp accessiories. kaes..been studying hell lot for the weekend. my three weekends were g0ne cause of the exams. wtf,i miss going out..

had a quarrel with my maths tutor,he's utterly disappointed in me. but has he ever ever though of how much stress i'm receiving not only from him but also others. is maths the only subject i'm taking exam? does he care abt the existance of other subjects..`-sighs-

hmms..guess that's all...outtie for my dinnerr....

2004-05-08T17:26:00.000+08:00

i hateee mathsss..!!

gawd,my tutor is making me hate maths. wtf..`i thought maths is all abt practising and what we do during tuition is he's guiding us only and he expects us to have more tuition with him just to improve our maths..? does it help?!

-sighs- hasn't been coming online these few days,have been studying lotsa`met up with steph and jeff since wed nite to study under my block. it's fun and peaceful..at least i won't be distracted. studied till 12 last night,jeff was slping [-_-'l|]..my sis kept calling me`i'm only downstairs as if i will meet with any trouble while steph's parents drop by. lols..been having mood swings these few days,my mood is always weird..~ =x

oh yah,my sis found out abt me and irwin..all thanks to her student..`wtf,he promised not to say and yet he still said. idiotic fellow! back to my sis,she didn't reprimand me for having a bf but she said that studies were my priority and that's of cuz. hmms,guess still left with my parents. if they know,i wonder what's their reaction. my brother found it out god damn long =p i dun hide things from him yea?

my sis lost 50 bucks this morning and she screamed her head off. but i din care abt it and go on be a piggy. but i found in the living room before tuition when i was clearing my com stuff. she's always forgetful and now my mother wants to inspect us later`..what the hell,do she need some reports or stuff lidat?~ hehes..dun give a damn abt it...

going to seoul garden tml with my cousins to celebrate my grandmother's birthday. sounds weird isn't it? lols..my sister is not planning to go cuz she has exams on monday...`after her exams are mine and after mine,is my brother's..`lols,my father actually intended to book a chalet but he decided not to cuz of the exams..~~~ gawd..daddie's buying food back from chomp*2..oh yeah,miz the food there...have to continue with my revision...

2004-05-06T18:12:00.000+08:00

ermss..didn't update for so many days`everything's fine. met up with steph and jeff ytd,studied under my block. we took some pictures t0o..=p so cute arhs..`

hmms,today is bad yet good,i'm so damn careless and blur today. got tricked by my clzmates ytd,i came into the clz and they kept laughing~ [-_-'l|] got kinda dulan when i kept asking and they din want to say. today is also my one month with dearie. went to far east with dearie and jeff and xinyi. hehes,double date wors`we took pics..=p then later we walked ard,saw my brother's fwenz [-_-'l|] hehes..we went separate ways with jeff they all. me and dearie bought something then treat it as love token. so cute and sweet =p hehes,on the way home saw jeff alone. idiot leh he,leave first..`

exams are here s0on,really have to study hard. =) having tuition later...gonna have a nap first before studying..`tc..

2004-05-04T15:28:00.000+08:00

the weather today suxs. make me so sweatly..

heyss,school's all right today. mr tanhn didn't come today,it's cool`~ all of us cheered then mrs er was kinda shock. lols. rn got caught for her hair this morning and she got a lecture frm ms ming. mrs er was grining when she saw that. so evil...

gawd,joanne today so worked up..we kept debating in class. hmms,having chemistry test tml. haven't study for it yet. idiot,exams are coming and ms chang gave us another test. she came in to relief our class today then we called her mrs sim. so funnie...

was caught late for recess but me and dearie escaped from the detention cause' we didn't report for it =x hehes,when i got back to class. kena teased by my dearest clzmates with those names. [-_-'l|] hehes,make timothy pay for it. hope he wun let my sister know..-sighs- went home with dearie,saw rn on the bus and she kept making funny faces at me...~

have to eat my lunch now..instant noodles agn...-sighs-...

2004-05-03T15:40:00.000+08:00

Just got back from lunch with joanne. sweet of her to send me to interchange =)

been studying hell alot nwadays due to exams. swear to go out lots during the holidays =p went out for dinner on sat night with my daddie and sister. we're planning mothers' day but mommie wasn't free always,kind of sad. ~sighs~ jie wants me to buy this year's pressie. wtf,cause she's also having exams at the same period as me`dearie came to meet after dinner,then chatted for one hour plus before going home. hehes,so happie=x i'm crazy...hmms,sunday..can say is slacked for the whole day. gotten this freaking headache,had some panadols before going to bed. woke up in the evening,did some stuff then called dearie. chatted for 2 hours =) mommie keep nagging at me cause she wanted to use the phone. we hanged up and i went to slp.

my classmates are planning to drop subjects. -sighs- daddie's gonna kill me if i ever mention it. hmms,the day is fine. had mood swings and my pms are really killing me`didn't go for recess today,chatted with steph along the corridoor. had a great laugh and fun. went for assembly,dozed off. lotsa pple were caught for it. lols,it's so boring`went back for english class. got angry for a while,shouted at joanne. so sorrie,gerx. i didn't mean it,gave steph a hug after class. felt much better w0rs..~ hehes,actually wanted to wait for dearie but he has to stay back for lotsa stuff. so i went n&b with joanne. had this swweeet chat,she told me what is a good stead =)

jie and mommie at home,have to study soon. or else they'll naggie agnx..wtff...miss dearie so much...

2004-05-01T17:48:00.000+08:00

hEyx..

since long when i last updated,my com is still as laggy as before. i'm drowned by the naggings given by my brother everyday [-_-'l|]

Happy belated birthday *wenz!
sorry for not buying you a present but i'll get it soon after the exams as promised =)

been a piggy these few days,slping during lessons =x ~sighs~ exams are coming soon,daddie is pressing me to study. mommie,jie and kor are all out,so daddie says it's a quiet day to study and he will be checking me every now and then. gawd! so now i'm sneaking down to use the com,he's out =x lols..

yea. let's see what happened on friday? fine yet bad. speech day of cause,did marching but i got kind of nervous during the march-in as cameras were flicking every now and then. i made some mistakes =x had some refreshments after the parade and we were allowed to go home. watched a show till i cried,it's really pityful or perhaps i'm just emotional. went for tuition in the afternoon. then i had dinner first before meeting the usual peeps. quarrelled with dearie,it really made my heart ache till now. ~sighs~ steph was late cause she was out with her friend. lols. Jeff keep "shooting" me,made me happy yet sad. had chicken wings for supper,felt so bloated. went home after that,had a discomfort in my stomach. turned in right after having tuition with mommie. gonna have another session tonight with her..wtf..~ didn't study at all last night,was feeling really terrible..my gawd~

woke up at 8 this morning,had breakfast with daddie and jiejie. jie was complaining that i'm always using the computer and phone. is there anything wrong with it?! she does it too. studied for the entire morning and afternoon. completed notecards on emaths,chem and physics,an achievement.

2004-04-28T22:15:00.000+08:00

ffreedoom..

finally let go of the friendship,took great courage to do so. btw,i just finished my tuition. called dearie,he didn't pick up the phone. perhaps he's aslp. Feeling energentic now,planning to burn midnight oil later =x

school's a lil bored today. had some lessons and school ended. during maths period,was figuring how to slp without letting the teacher knowing and jamie+jeff shouted my name. [-_-'l|] after school went for geo remedial..combination of two classes 3f and 3i~ then we rreally got mdm lim on her nerves and she threatened to cancel it. our class overjoyed but in the end,she didn't cancel it. during remedial,steph had a headache while i was hyper,then i tired liaos..then her headache is gone. [-_-'l|] first part,i was laming while the second part she was the one. lols. went home after school with yun,ting and ru. they came over to my house,and they used the com of cause. yun stayed till 5 plus while ting and ru left earlier at 4plus. hmms,had a nap till 7 after that =x i didn't know it was raining so heavily just now till my tutor came all wet. hahas. have to start my revision...

where's dearie?! where's emmaline's mail?! i miss you all badly.....

oh yahs,hAppy Birthday KaNgQuAn..sorry for not preparing your birthday present..~ cause i only know it today. b0ix,you still own me 15 times!*

2004-04-27T16:10:00.000+08:00

back from school..goin out soon in a lil while..

school's pathetic today. i felt so sleepy. first two period was english,mr sim keep asking us to do corrections then we quarrelled with nnq they all. went for chemistry,was dozing off during her lessons. i was also dozing off during physics lessons. ask steph acc me go toilet,then she drag till i not slpy that time then she go toilet wash face [-_-'l|] cute hors? after school,went lunch with jamie. these few days keep playing with her,her reaction very funnie. talked with steph and jeff for the whole maths remedial,tanhn was talking to himself. almost the whole class also talking among themselves. lolx. going for tuition soon,be back at night and steph is coming t0o..yea..hahas...

2004-04-26T20:38:00.000+08:00

wtf! jo's isn't in the mood today...

i typed this entry for the third time,hope it works. slept at 12 plus last night cause i forgotten to do my geo file and before i could complete it,daddie came in and nagged me to slp. went to bed without completing it,forget it.

school's obviously bad. had checkup today and the nurse checked my backbone. she said i was all right,just some exercise is needed to be done. i wanted to ask the nurse to send me to goh for further checkup. but i didn't. got back my physics and maths test. got 13 upon 36 for physics,am i satisfied? at least i won quite a number of pple. don't give a damn abt it. i passed my maths test,got 10 upon 17.

i cried today. yeah,i did. wtf. i'm not shedding crocodile tears and i cried over a slut who wasn't worth of my tears. tears of disappointment,tears of angry but never tears of joy or whatsoever. my tears just flowed down,just couldn't control myself. she backstabbed me. what the hell. i don't need you to backstab me as i'm already numb to such things. i don't need you to harm or scold my friends cause if you do,u're hurting more than one person. i don't need you to talk behind my back cause what's wrong with talking me face to face? don't tell me you're guilty. since you have the courage to talk behind my back,why can't talk face to face then. Thanks for letting me what a person you are. no point hiding your bad points,there isn't a need to hide your cunning face to me cause i've seen it before. i've enough,enough of you. tolerate more than expected.

went to mac with dearie,yun,jass and ru. then yun bueysong me. keep bullying my dearie,den i bueysong her back. but we quarrel in a joking manner. that's cute. left mac abt 6.30. hmms,got a long list of people to thank. firstly,mAnz for lending me your d/c. don't get too upset kaes..secondly,yun for "bueysong-ing" with me. lol. thirdly,steph for cheering me up in the hall. forthly,jamie for playing with me. last but not least bahs,dearie gave me a sense of secure when i saw him today. =)

2004-04-25T13:21:00.000+08:00

a quick updatee..

Just had my lunch with only my brother and mother. Was kinda suprised that mommie didn't give me a lecture when she saw my hp bill. cause`i blown it. =x She didn't even mentioned abt it. lols. Has been slacking for the whole morning,don't want to touch my hwk. it sucks~ exams are coming...wtf..

Woke up at 830 this morning,msg-ed dearie with my hi-card.`gonna msg him later. btw,i've not been using my sim card for the past week. cause` i overused it so i bought a hi-card. if u guys msg me and i didn't reply,sorry. and also if there's anything urgent,give me a call or send me a mail or whatsoever. i'll resume using it nxt month.

Have to stop using the computer,my brother is peeping and giving me hints already. [-_-'l|] lols. stop here then...